These days, when I answer the phone I say nothing and wait a few seconds for the caller to Identify themselves - If they don't, I hang up because it's just a computer calling me from a call centre trying to sell me stuff no one would buy unless it was forced on them - I try to hang-up just after the line is clicked-in by the rotation dialler so that they get billed and the computer records that the number has been answered, otherwise they call again.
I have an amusing little routine with telemarketers. My number has been falsely assigned in the local phone book to a Mr. Ho as well as (correctly) to me. You cn tell teh telemarketers immediately when, after having told them you aren't Mr. Ho, they continue on undaunted. I loathe that false sense of intimacy they exploit by knowing your name when you don't know theirs. So I exploit it. Whatever they say I just interrupt and remind them that I'm not Mr. Ho. It can get very funny, because under no circumstances will they tell me the truth: we don't care who we're talking to; we just want to sell you some crap. Some of them get really exasperated. I can only guess that it never occurred to them how rude and dishonest they were in violating normal conversational conventions. Some of them are so deeply into their schtick that they think I'm the one being rude when I play it straight.
Wombat wrote:I have an amusing little routine with telemarketers. ...after having told them you aren't Mr. Ho, they continue on undaunted. Whatever they say I just interrupt and remind them that I'm not Mr. Ho.
It may be the hour, or just my present frame of mind; but somehow the notion of this "conversation," with the dialogue consisting of the boiler-room twerp rabbiting on, alternating with "I'm not Mr. Ho," has me giggling. It should be an absurdist play: "I'm Not Mr Ho."
Back in Norn Iron, in the Troubles, people pulled a lot of scams to get information using the phone.
There was supposed to be a strict telephone ettiquette.
When you picked up the phone, you were meant to say your phone number. Not your name, not anything else, JUST the phone number.
This so that callers would know if they had a wrong number.
Then the callers were meant to identify themseves.
If they didn't, you were meant to say "Who is calling?" (and nothing else).
I can remember a few conversations that went on
"Who is calling?"
"Who is that?"
for a few minutes, before someone gave in.
Nowadays, arguably more relaxed perhaps, I say "Cairns family,"
and since it is very seldom for me, "How may I direct your call?"
Tell us something.: A long time chatty Chiffer but have been absent for almost two decades. Returned in 2022 and still recognize some names! I also play anglo concertina now.
When I was young, my best friend's father answered the phone with a version of "Hello" that sounded like "Yellow". Whenever I was over and heard him answer the phone I would have to try not to giggle. It made me want to start answering the phone with "Blue"...
fiddleronvermouth wrote:Personally I love it when people call me looking for "the man of the house". I just laugh and laugh and laugh until they hang up.
And you don't lilt it for them???
Remember, you didn't get the tiger so it would do what you wanted. You got the tiger to see what it wanted to do. -- Colin McEnroe
The proper response to "Who is this?" is "You go first."
And the response to "Is Mr. Gonzo there?" should be "That depends on who you are."
Back in the days before we had the no-call list, I used to consider it my responsibility to keep these people on the phone as long as possible, because to them, time is money, and I liked to spend as much of theirs as possible. I once kept a guy selling discount club memberships on the line for about half an hour explaining to me the difference between a major appliance and a minor appliance. ("If a stove is a major appliance, how about a toaster over? Is that a major appliance? Do power tools count as appliances? Why isn't a vacuum a major appliance; some of those are pretty big? -- and so on.) But alas, now that I'm on the no-call list, those opportunities are rare, and I have to content myself with toyng with the Republicans and the christians, who unfortunately are exempt from no-call.
Crazy for the blue white and red
Crazy for the blue white and red
And yellow fringe
Crazy for the blue white red and yellow
IF you are ever in Cincinnati, and you are talking to a "native" - be prepared for the following:
You: blah,blah,blah
Cincinnatian: Please?
"Please" is used as meaning "I didn't understand or hear what you said, can you repeat it?". People speculate that it comes from the time when Cincinnati was predominantly of German ancestory - I have no idea if that's true.
Nanohedron wrote:What I love is when the caller says, "Who is this?"
I find this weird, too, but for another reason. The following is lifted from a thread dating back to 2002:
I wrote:
When I first came over here, I couldn't figure out why when I answered the phone people would say "Is this Steve?" I always felt like saying, well if you don't know who you are, how do you expect me to help you?
I mean, this _was_ Steve, from my point of view, but I would have expected them to say "Is _that_ Steve?"
And I remember feeling totally disoriented the first time someone said, "Oh, are you travelling to Europe? Would you bring a package for my mother in England?"
(Whaddya mean, bring? I'm going, so I can take it. If I were coming, maybe I could bring it...)