table manners

[djm]

Just when I thought we were getting friendly!

Sorry, my bad table manners showing through.

Actually, I am now wondering if you didn't just stab the whole thing and hoist it up to gnaw a piece off.

Can't wait for the opportunity to embarrass you.

djm

[I.D.10-t]

This much controversy on knife / fork use, I wonder what would be said about how the toilet paper roll is wound. Proper European underhanded, or American over hand. :boggle:

[Nanohedron]

I can't count the times I have purposefully violated the vagaries of table etiquette. Context counts, of course. There was the time all the family were together for the holidays, and during the course of the meal we'd run out of red wine. Having to resort to the white and not wanting to trammel it with the leavings of the red in my glass, I wiped out the interior of it with a napkin, deeming that course of action to be the far lesser of two evils (remember, we're talking wine, here) and me being too lazy to arise, go to the kitchen, and rinse it out if I were too lazier yet to grab a fresh glass. My parents were mortified, and made sure I was reminded that one does not do such a thing in public. My stance was that I was not "in public", but among family, and if one can't relax a standard or two among family, what good is that? They had no answer, and I ruined a perfectly good family dining experience for them.

Actually, I am now wondering if you didn't just stab the whole thing and hoist it up to gnaw a piece off.

I'm sure I've done that, too.

[amar]

This much controversy on knife / fork use, I wonder what would be said about how the toilet paper roll is wound. Proper European underhanded, or American over hand.

wonder no longer, C&F answers all.


http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php ... ilet+paper

[I.D.10-t]

This much controversy on knife / fork use, I wonder what would be said about how the toilet paper roll is wound. Proper European underhanded, or American over hand. :boggle:

http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php ... ilet+paper

Should have known.

Online Etiquette (1922) great reading.

[Joseph E. Smith]

Actually, I am now wondering if you didn't just stab the whole thing and hoist it up to gnaw a piece off.

Personally, I disdain the use of utensils. I prefer to have my food on the plate directly below my nose, then sort of let my whole head and shoulders fall forward, like, into whatever is there. I only surface again to have a drink of milk... which I keep next to the plate in a large cereal bowl. Drinking is done pretty much the same as eating. Soups (especially chowders) are perticularly fun!

[Nanohedron]

...and I ruined a perfectly good family dining experience for them.

...which, by the way, is NOT an endorsement, should any of you be wondering. I was more fractious and contrary back then, and didn't much care if I trampled others' rose gardens, if you will.

[djm]

Personally, I disdain the use of utensils. I prefer to have my food on the plate directly below my nose, then sort of let my whole head and shoulders fall forward, like, into whatever is there. I only surface again to have a drink of milk... which I keep next to the plate in a large cereal bowl. Drinking is done pretty much the same as eating. Soups (especially chowders) are perticularly fun!

You can have dinner at my house any time!

I tend to agree. There is no necessary use for utensils when dealing with toilet paper.

djm

[Nanohedron]

Then there was the time I was dining out with my then-not-ex wife. There was a young couple seated across the way from us, and during the course of their feed (I use the word intentionally), the sturdy fellow actually lifted his right butt cheek, let out a big f*rt, reestablished his normal seating arrangement, and went back to the business at hand. If his lady companion so much as batted an eye, I couldn't tell. Seemed like just another day for her.

Even I was nonplussed. Yes, so it was at Red Lobster, but still. It cast a pall over the escargot.

[BigDavy]

Nanohedron said

the sturdy fellow actually lifted his right butt cheek, let out a big f*rt, reestablished his normal seating arrangement, and went back to the business at hand.

This is ridiculous - everyone knows you should lift the left cheek for a f*rt.


David

[Nanohedron]

Nanohedron said

the sturdy fellow actually lifted his right butt cheek, let out a big f*rt, reestablished his normal seating arrangement, and went back to the business at hand.

This is ridiculous - everyone knows you should lift the left cheek for a f*rt.


David

I can't fully agree. When farting at table in public, I think good manners dictate that one NOT direct one's emissions toward others whenever one has such an option. Right or left becomes a matter of exercising consideration and, consequently, social skills. His f*rt was directed us-wards (which I failed to mention; sorry), and so I was of the opinion that in his case, the left ought to have been used if he had any intention of being socially acceptable.

There's another school of thought on this, though: that gassy eruptions ought not be directed to the confines of one's booth for the sake of one's companions if one happens to even have any. Sensible enough, but I don't hew to this opinion.

[Cynth]

Then there was the time I was dining out with my then-not-ex wife. There was a young couple seated across the way from us, and during the course of their feed (I use the word intentionally), the sturdy fellow actually lifted his right butt cheek, let out a big f*rt, reestablished his normal seating arrangement, and went back to the business at hand. If his lady companion so much as batted an eye, I couldn't tell. Seemed like just another day for her....

It probably was just like another day for this poor woman. Don't blame her! She has shown her stunning mastery of etiquette here which demands that we pretend the unspeakable has not happened. No doubt, being unfortunately attached to this boor, she has had plenty of practice.

[Nanohedron]

Then there was the time I was dining out with my then-not-ex wife. There was a young couple seated across the way from us, and during the course of their feed (I use the word intentionally), the sturdy fellow actually lifted his right butt cheek, let out a big f*rt, reestablished his normal seating arrangement, and went back to the business at hand. If his lady companion so much as batted an eye, I couldn't tell. Seemed like just another day for her....

It probably was just like another day for this poor woman. Don't blame her! She has shown her stunning mastery of etiquette here which demands that we pretend the unspeakable has not happened. No doubt, being unfortunately attached to this boor, she has had plenty of practice.

I thought as much, myself.

[Walden]

I'd like to extend a hand of reconciliation. Let's join hands, around the table, and sing! "There's no place that I'd rather be than right here, with my red necks, white socks..."

[Nanohedron]

I'd like to extend a hand of reconciliation. Let's join hands, around the table, and sing! "There's no place that I'd rather be than right here, with my red necks, white socks..."