best way to mend a broken heart?

BillChin · Post by **BillChin** » Tue May 17, 2005 5:38 pm

This is/was helpful to me:
Send her love. Saying an affirmation such as: Where ever she is, who ever she is with, I send her love. I bless whatever contact I have with this person. I let go of any attachment, of any control.
--
Writing can be therapeutic. Journaling, songs, poems are all good outlets for angst.
--
If all else fails, duct tape, has been used to mend lots of things

.

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Tue May 17, 2005 5:45 pm

BillChin wrote:If all else fails, duct tape, has been used to mend lots of things .

Somehow, I don't think bondage games will save a relationship.

Post by **Nanohedron** » Tue May 17, 2005 5:48 pm

jsluder wrote:
Nanohedron wrote:Yes, definitely hang with your friends even if you don't quite feel up to it. Just be yourself.
Form an outlaw band... rob banks, hang with your friends...

Amar's already twisting slowly in the breeze, as it were.

Joseph E. Smith · Post by **Joseph E. Smith** » Tue May 17, 2005 6:24 pm

jsluder wrote:
BillChin wrote:If all else fails, duct tape, has been used to mend lots of things .
Somehow, I don't think bondage games will save a relationship.

... probably not, but they can be therapeutic.

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Tue May 17, 2005 8:08 pm

Joseph E. Smith wrote:
jsluder wrote:
BillChin wrote:If all else fails, duct tape, has been used to mend lots of things .
Somehow, I don't think bondage games will save a relationship.
... probably not, but they can be therapeutic.
_________________
My head hurts... it hurts a lot...

JES

Is that why your head hurts... a lot?

Wormdiet · Post by **Wormdiet** » Tue May 17, 2005 8:35 pm

I;ve been going through some emotional trauma myself lately, nothing like as serious though.

Nothing bad ever happens as a result of a long walk in a beautiful area.

Play your whistle in a beautiful spot outdoors. Where you are, that shouldn;t be hard to find.

Get excited about something. Anything.

I.D.10-t · Post by **I.D.10-t** » Tue May 17, 2005 8:40 pm

I must say that what has helped me is this...

Love her. Wish for what makes her happy and help her find the right path, even if it is away from you. If you ever truly liked her, it will make you happy that she is happy(even if at the same time painful). At least, that is my experience. If you are lucky, she will do the same.

Best Wishes,
CRC

HDSarah · Post by **HDSarah** » Tue May 17, 2005 8:41 pm

BillChin wrote: If all else fails, duct tape, has been used to mend lots of things .

Definitely in the running for my all-time favorite song:
Duct Tape Madrigal in Cmajor, by Lou Nathanson

Duct tape, duct tape, oh where is my duct tape
My old boat is leaking; my window is cracked
My poor heart is broken I'll fix it with duct tape
Fix it with duct tape, 'til you come back.

(there's more!)
see http://www.alaska.net/~ldn/
Click on "The recordings, with samples"
There's a sample of this song. I didn't listen to see how much they put in the sample.
I think it's well worth buying the CD just for this song. Some of the other songs are pretty funny, too.

[Disclaimer: I am not associated in any way with Lou Nathanson; in fact I don't even know him. I just think he's funny.]

Wormdiet · Post by **Wormdiet** » Tue May 17, 2005 9:54 pm

OR. . .

Solicit online flirtation with people whom you don;t really know!

jim stone · Post by **jim stone** » Tue May 17, 2005 10:07 pm

There are groups for people going through divorce,
that basically help them let go--there's a whole process
of grieving. I did this after a former wife ran out on me--
wow, did that hurt. Felt like she had just died except she
was suing me. Any way it helped a good deal. Well,
maybe there's a group like that for you.

The bit about the good cry with one's friends sounds
helpful.
It's possible to have a consultation or three with a psychotherapist
or counselor for just a particular problem--I've
done that in the past about local issues.
If I were really suffering from a broken heart,
I might do that.

avanutria · Post by **avanutria** » Wed May 18, 2005 12:58 am

I.D.10-t wrote:I must say that what has helped me is this...

Love her. Wish for what makes her happy and help her find the right path, even if it is away from you. If you ever truly liked her, it will make you happy that she is happy(even if at the same time painful). At least, that is my experience. If you are lucky, she will do the same.

Best Wishes,
CRC

I agree with the above, and with giving yourself time.

Also, don't throw away keepsakes, photos, memories...put them away for a while when it hurts to look at them, but someday you will want to look, and remember, and smile without pain.

Matt_Paris · Post by **Matt_Paris** » Wed May 18, 2005 1:44 am

Sorry for my pessimistic point of view...

I had mine broken nine years ago, and I'm still living alone with a cat and a huge flute collection (Don't do that!) Not that I didn't try to move on...

Martin Milner · Post by **Martin Milner** » Wed May 18, 2005 3:31 am

Allow yourself to think about her, to cry at times, bawl, sniffle and drip snot, when you need to. It needs to come out.

Immerse yourself in those activities which give you pleasure - music, walking, dancing, reading, whatever.

Dwell on the good things in life: a blackbird singing in a tree, the sun reflecting on a lake, a curious snatch of conversation overheard on a bus.

In time, meet someone new who proves to be wonderful, beautiful within and without, your soulmate in mind, body and spirit.

Get married, have kids if you wish, grow old, die (smiling).

Joseph E. Smith · Post by **Joseph E. Smith** » Wed May 18, 2005 3:40 am

jsluder wrote:
Joseph E. Smith wrote:
jsluder wrote: Somehow, I don't think bondage games will save a relationship.
... probably not, but they can be therapeutic.
_________________
My head hurts... it hurts a lot...

JES
Is that why your head hurts... a lot?

... I will never tell.

Flyingcursor · Post by **Flyingcursor** » Wed May 18, 2005 3:44 am

Sorry to hear it Amar.

I don't think the Bee-Gee's figured it out either.

The problem with many of the great suggestions so far is when your suffering, stuff seems to happen all around you to rub it in and remind you. If you take a walk you'll see someone do something exactly the way "she" would do it. If you play an instrument you'll remember a song that reminds you of "her". Heaven forbid you should listen to Country Western.

But as Mick Jagger said, "Time is on my side. Yes it is."