EXORCISE the EXTRA-HOLERS' HERESY! (time for a brawl)

Darwin · Post by **Darwin** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 2:42 pm

BrassBlower wrote:Om mani padme hum.

Om mani padme tweet!

NicoMoreno · Post by **NicoMoreno** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 2:47 pm

Sorry but I was talking finger holes only, and I stand by my chant:

SIX HOLES GOOD! EIGHT HOLES BETTER!!

after all: recorders DO have more than eight... but pipes have EXACTLY eight!

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 2:53 pm

NicoMoreno wrote:Sorry but I was talking finger holes only, and I stand by my chant:

SIX HOLES GOOD! EIGHT HOLES BETTER!!

after all: recorders DO have more than eight... but pipes have EXACTLY eight!

Nanohedronic inflation is sweeping the nation. The easiest way to be holier than thou.

IDAwHOa · Post by **IDAwHOa** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 3:45 pm

MOM! Zube is doing it again!

Daniel_Bingamon · Post by **Daniel_Bingamon** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 4:49 pm

Ack!! Eight holes are for whimps. You need eleven holes to really stir up a bee-hive. Thirteen if you include the fipple and the bore end hole.

NicoMoreno · Post by **NicoMoreno** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 4:59 pm

That's been said!

Besides, I am sticking strickly to fingerholes... otherwise we could count all the holes for regulater keys, drone ends, bellows low holes. etc...

Chuck_Clark · Post by **Chuck_Clark** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 6:14 pm

Oh, goody - an ON-TOPIC fight!

Nanohedron wrote:[guru mode]

All creation shows the Face of God, even r*c*rd*rs. Let us not oppress those who oppress us, but show the Light in our everyday deeds, and those of the Dark Side will envy us for our sunnier dispositions, and come to seek the Divine Playful Nature in The Six Holes.

Yours in Satyagraha,

Sri Nanonanda

[/guru mode]

Actually, I believe the above passage is rife with unwonted optimism. Logically, it seems clear to me that, far from the divine inspiration of the simple yet marvelously subtle whistle design, the complex and awkward r*c*rd*r shows a distinctly demonic influence.

While I would not go so far as to directly accuse any extra-holing whistlesmith of demonic intent, I cannot help but fear that he has unknowingly come under the demonic taint of the extral holes. Can it be long before he adds a (shudder) THUMB HOLE!?!?!?!?

Zubivka is to be commended for bringing this grave matter to our attention. I urge that we adopt the time-honored governmental solution and APPOINT A COMMITEE!

I further nominate Zubivka for the position of chairperson.

Post by **Nanohedron** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 6:24 pm

Wombat wrote:
NicoMoreno wrote:Sorry but I was talking finger holes only, and I stand by my chant:

SIX HOLES GOOD! EIGHT HOLES BETTER!!

after all: recorders DO have more than eight... but pipes have EXACTLY eight!
Nanohedronic inflation is sweeping the nation. The easiest way to be holier than thou.

Applying the most stringent Nanohedronic inflationary parameters, I decided to tackle theoretically your basic full set of uilleann pipes, given a five-keyed chanter. Although I have included telescoping and, thus, removable tubing in this study, I have excluded all reeds, capped tubage ends, and strap holes. One must set SOME limits, after all. Here are my findings, in no particular order:

Chanter: 15
Drones: 16
Chanter cap: 2
Chanter stock: 2
Mainstock cup: 2
Blowpipe stock: 2
Bag: 3
Blowpipe: 2
Bellows: 2
Mainstock (not hollow): 11
Regulators: 15, excluding the holes for tuning pins. Limits, again.
Bass regulator cap: 1

I think that's everything. So this gives us...*counts fingers*... a grand total of, allowing for some error or debate, 71 Nanohedronic points of vacuity.

Hard to beat that.

NicoMoreno · Post by **NicoMoreno** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 6:32 pm

to be fair, let us only consider holes where sound originates... ie the windway on a recorder doesn't count, but neither do any of the holes from bag through to finger holes on the chanter.... that gives 10 on my chanter (on;y one key)

but with 5 keys that would be 14

then regulaters: only count where key holes are
Drones: only the ends...
That's it

how many is that?
still more than a recorder

Post by **Nanohedron** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 6:43 pm

NicoMoreno wrote:how many is that?
still more than a recorder

And all the more insidious.

carrie · Post by **carrie** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 6:48 pm

Zubivka wrote: The spirit of evil casts its shadow on our bored boorish board:

Some--may they rest in pieces--ventured to call for a seventh hole in the Pipe, when the Lord did all the music in SIX, and put the Seventh to rest.

Just what we need: another Hole-y War.

Carol

emmline · Post by **emmline** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 7:01 pm

What if I want 7 holes?
How about 9?

(Geezowhiz...haven't you guys read Seuss's book about the star-bellied sneetches?)

Mud dwelling stasists...all of you!

What if I want 170 holes?

NicoMoreno · Post by **NicoMoreno** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 7:06 pm

buy a cheese grater

Post by **Nanohedron** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 7:07 pm

NicoMoreno · Post by **NicoMoreno** » Fri Mar 12, 2004 7:09 pm

or a boehm flute... oh wait, aren't they the same?

seriously now...

Chiff and Fipple Forums

EXORCISE the EXTRA-HOLERS' HERESY! (time for a brawl)

Re: EXORCISE the EXTRA-HOLERS' HERESY! (time for a brawl)