Advice survey: best, worst, silliest/funniest

BillChin · Post by **BillChin** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 12:14 am

There is that famous movie scene in the "Graduate" where the secret word of career advice is "plastics."

What is the best advice you have ever received?
(and followed, separate subcategory for did not follow)

What is the worst advice?

What are some of the silliest/funniest words of advice?

I'll take some time to ruminate and post my reponses in a bit. Relevant information might include your approximate age at the time, a brief situation sketch as to why you asked for or need advice, what relationship the advice giver has to you (friend, family, anonymous Internet person). Of course, don't reveal too much if it would embarass the other person if they read it (they might you know with the power of search engines).

Jack · Post by **Jack** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 12:23 am

Bill, the some of the best advice I've ever been given was from a member here on medical issues, but sadly we are not allowed to discuss these kinds of things anymore, especially if it is medical advice or advice that might be construed as medical or relating to any kind of health problem or medical condition:

from: http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php?t=37795

I would love to share the advice, but Dale won't let me!

harpmaker · Post by **harpmaker** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 1:01 am

Best advice: If you are going to properly argue with an idiot, you have to get down to his level.... End result; two idiots

Worst advice: You should ask her to marry you.

Bloomfield · Post by **Bloomfield** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 7:04 am

Bill, nice thread, hope it will recover from Cranberry.

Cranberry wrote:Bill, the some of the best advice I've ever been given was from a member here on medical issues, but sadly we are not allowed to discuss these kinds of things anymore, especially if it is medical advice or advice that might be construed as medical or relating to any kind of health problem or medical condition:

from: http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php?t=37795

I would love to share the advice, but Dale won't let me!

Cran, if you can't remember from one thread to the next what Dale said, then copy & paste. During your presence here on the chiffboard, the overwhelming sense has not been that Dale "won't let you." You've been indulged like no one else around here.

If you don't understand what is being said, or what it means when someone says "this is an uncomfortable topic, and I ask your understanding," then perhaps it's time that you take a break from posting on the chiffboard and focus on your class work. Seriously.

Apologies again, Bill.

chas · Post by **chas** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 7:21 am

Best: Never use two words when one will suffice. Minimize your use of adverbs and adjectives; use stronger nouns and verbs.

Worst advice: There was an admissions officer for college. He told me that I shouldn't intend to major in science in college because I certainly was never going to be a scientist. It's 25 years later, and have been working as a physicist for 15 years. I've loved just about every minute of it, too. Needless to say I didn't go to the college where that bonehead worked.

susnfx · Post by **susnfx** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 8:50 am

Keep Your Big Mouth Shut.

(advice given to myself over and over and over and over......)

Tyghress · Post by **Tyghress** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 8:55 am

Best advice (from my father an accountant) -- ""accounting will be something you use for the rest of your life -- the basis for any career."

Worst advice (often from my mother) -- "don't ask questions, just do it."

Good grief, that was boring wasn't it? How about this....my best and worst whistling advice...

Best: Enjoy your music! (Bless you, Lee...its the one I always come back to!)
Worst: You'll never be as good as the average Irish player, so don't even try.

CHCBrown · Post by **CHCBrown** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 9:09 am

Best advice (from my Dad, on joining the Army):

"Never pass up an opportunity to eat, sleep, or use the latrine."

BillChin · Post by **BillChin** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 9:17 am

If anything I tend to be cynical and bullheaded so I usually don't ask for, and usually don't take advice. In general, I have found very little use for advice, I am hoping other people have had more positive experiences.

That said, it is not advice, but a few words that meant a lot to me. Many years ago, before my first college interview with a big name school. I was talking to a high school friend about my concerns and at the end of the conversation the friend said three words, "you'll do fine." I'm sure for some people that means nothing, but it was the first words of encouragement that I could ever remember receiving, and I remember it so many years later.

As for bad advice, more recently, I was interested romantically in a woman. I solicited advice from another friend, a married woman. She told me to try and make the first woman jealous. Now, that may work when a woman is "pursuing" a man, but let me tell you it was a disaster, or at least my execution of it.

Funniest bit, someone I used to work with, would sign the office birthday cards with "Kick it hard!" Well, for all the would be Charlie Brown's out there, that is a good one, Lucy van Pelt be d*mned.

Post by **Dale** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 9:32 am

Cranberry wrote:Bill, the some of the best advice I've ever been given was from a member here on medical issues, but sadly we are not allowed to discuss these kinds of things anymore, especially if it is medical advice or advice that might be construed as medical or relating to any kind of health problem or medical condition:

from: http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php?t=37795

I would love to share the advice, but Dale won't let me!

Everytime you've done this, I've responded privately. I'm now responding publicly. This is an immature, pouty, whiney, he's being mean to me, y'all! response that offends the heck out of me but also makes you look, well, immature, pouty and whiney.

Wanderer · Post by **Wanderer** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 9:49 am

Cranberry wrote:Bill, the some of the best advice I've ever been given was from a member here on medical issues, but sadly we are not allowed to discuss these kinds of things anymore, especially if it is medical advice or advice that might be construed as medical or relating to any kind of health problem or medical condition:

from: http://chiffboard.mati.ca/viewtopic.php?t=37795

I would love to share the advice, but Dale won't let me!

On the other hand, some of the best advice I ever recieved, I recieved as a child: Suck it up and quit whining.

susnfx · Post by **susnfx** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 9:56 am

Oh, Bill's story reminded me of something that wasn't given as advice but taught me a huge life lesson nonetheless:

I had knee surgery right after high school and went into major feel-sorry-for-myself mode about what I could and couldn't do. I guess I whined about it a lot and people got sick of hearing about it. One day, when walking down a hallway in the Justice Building in Washington D.C., I was moaning to a friend about my knees hurting all the time and how sick I was of it. At that moment we happened to walk past a man who only had one arm. My friend said, "I'll bet he's awful sick of only having one arm."

I've never forgotten it.

Susan

SteveShaw · Post by **SteveShaw** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 11:05 am

Never trust a f*rt.

Steve

missy · Post by **missy** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 11:24 am

best from my dad: Life's not fair. Get used to it. (and I've taught my kids that one too)

worse from my mom: Why would you want to go into science? Why don't you work as a secretary or something?

and one that's learned from experience - Don't wait for tomorrow. If you can do it today, do it today, because tomorrow may never come. You can plan for tomorrow, but live today as if it's your last.

silly: Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.

Denny · Post by **Denny** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 11:45 am

Never attribute to malice that which can be explained by stupidity. Robert Heinlein

When the ship lifts, all bills are paid. No regrets. Robert Heinlein