Demotivators

Darwin · Post by **Darwin** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 2:33 am

I haven't seen these before. Perfect Christmas gifts.

From Despair, Inc.

Introducing Demotivators®

MOTIVATION. Psychology tells us that motivation- true, lasting motivation- can only come from within. Common sense tells us it can’t be manufactured or productized. So how is it that a multi-billion dollar industry thrives through the sale of motivational commodities and services? Because, in our world of instant gratification, people desperately want to believe that there are simple solutions to complex problems. And when desperation has disposable income, market opportunities abound.

AT DESPAIR, INC., we believe motivational products create unreleastic expectations, raising hopes only to dash them. That’s why we created our soul-crushingly depressing Demotivators® designs, so you can skip the delusions that motivational products induce and head straight for the disappointments that follow!

The illustrations are beautiful. Here are a few of the messages:

"That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable."

"There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots."

"The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you."

"Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people."

"No single raindrop believes it is responsible for the flood."

"It takes 43 muscles to frown and 17 to smile, but it doesn't take any to just sit there with a dumb look on your face."

missy · Post by **missy** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 6:37 am

Darwin, my boss loves these - one of them always seems to "sneak" into any powerpoint presentation he makes!!! Always takes the stuffy higher-ups a few seconds to realize just WHAT they are looking at.......

I.D.10-t · Post by **I.D.10-t** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 8:02 am

Morale is a crutch for poor leaders.
Disciplinary action will be taken until morale improves.

peteinmn · Post by **peteinmn** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 3:03 pm

Excellent!

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 3:38 pm

Wishes

When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

Cynth · Post by **Cynth** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 4:26 pm

Those are great

. The "positive" ones make me cranky every time I see them. These are much more up my alley!

jim stone · Post by **jim stone** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 4:31 pm

If you can keep your head while all those about you
are losing theirs and blaming it on you, they
know something you don't.

chas · Post by **chas** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 5:47 pm

"Pain, bruising, and swelling are all part of the healing process."

Cynth · Post by **Cynth** » Sun Dec 04, 2005 9:00 pm

If you aren't flipping out, then you don't understand the problem.

Flyingcursor · Post by **Flyingcursor** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:43 am

They've been around for a few years. Always a bolster to my morale.

fearfaoin · Post by **fearfaoin** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:57 am

For years, I've had a Demotivation poster featuring a midair circle
of skydivers, and the caption: "Never underestimate the power of
stupid people in large groups." It was surprisingly apropos for my
employer at the time.

Joseph E. Smith · Post by **Joseph E. Smith** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 8:20 am

This one does it for me...

Flyingcursor · Post by **Flyingcursor** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 11:12 am

Joseph E. Smith wrote:This one does it for me...

That picture always gave me the creeps. However notice the direction of the sea-creature's tail fin. Horizontal.

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 11:24 am

He who laughs last laughs loudest. He's the dork you hear laughing in the distance when you reach the car park.

The early bird catches the worm. The least said about the early worm the better.

Gone but not forgotten. Rather like a stale f*rt.

Every journey begins with a single step. Then another, and another, and another ....

Everything comes to he who waits ... piles, arthritis, bunions ....

fearfaoin · Post by **fearfaoin** » Mon Dec 05, 2005 12:19 pm

Flyingcursor wrote:That picture always gave me the creeps. However notice the direction of the sea-creature's tail fin. Horizontal.

Yup. It's a dolphin.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/surfer.asp