Is there any whistle Humor or Jokes?

Dzhokar · Post by **Dzhokar** » Wed Jun 12, 2002 11:43 pm

This is an old marching band joke, but I guess it could apply to all drummers in general : )

Q: How can you tell your being followed by a drummer?

A: You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.

Rod Sprague · Post by **Rod Sprague** » Fri Jun 14, 2002 2:03 am

We've gone over the bohdran stereotype quite thoroughly, which makes me think of some other musical stereotypes. I know that oboists are said to be completely mad, as the nasal sound of the obo is said to resonate in the sinuses, damaging their frontal lobes. I just hope that is an urban legend! Being a Celtic tenor I hope I don't fit the stereotype of the tenor that was best expressed in the title of the book of operatic humor "Men, Women and Tenors". My mom is a classically trained operatic soprano who sounds like Beverly Sills. She fits the stereotype best described by the joke "How come sopranos can't change light bulbs? They grasp the bulb and expect the world to revolve around them." I played the baritone sax in high school (which being heavy and held up with a neck strap resulted in my neck being wider than my head! I looked like an otter) and I have no idea what they say about players of that instrument.

[ This Message was edited by: Rod Sprague on 2002-06-14 04:04 ]

skywatcher · Post by **skywatcher** » Fri Jun 14, 2002 8:54 am

Why did God invent Guinness?

So the Irish wouldn't take over the world.

Walden · Post by **Walden** » Sat Jun 15, 2002 12:02 am

Here're a few more.

Q: What's the definition of a minor second?
A: Two whistles playing a unison.

Q: How do you know a low whistle player is playing loud?
A: You can almost hear him.

Q: How do you make a teakettle sound like a tinwhistle?
A: Add vibrato.

Q: How do you keep your whistle from getting stolen?
A: Put it in a recorder case.

Q: How many whistle jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.

_________________

Walden
_________________

<BLINK><MARQUEE>Deus converte nos et ostende faciem tuam et salvi erimus</BLINK></MARQUEE>

[ This Message was edited by: Walden on 2002-06-15 04:52 ]

avanutria · Post by **avanutria** » Sat Jun 15, 2002 12:15 am

On 2002-06-14 10:54, skywatcher wrote:
Why did God invent Guinness?

So the Irish wouldn't take over the world.

I saw that on a Tshirt in Erie PA, of all places.

Snuh · Post by **Snuh** » Sat Jun 15, 2002 8:19 pm

Q: What's the difference between an accordion and a trampoline?
A: You take your shoes off before jumping on a trampoline.

Q: What's the difference between an accordion and an onion?
A: No one cries when you cut up an accordion.

Snuh

[ This Message was edited by: snuh on 2002-06-20 17:19 ]

Rod Sprague · Post by **Rod Sprague** » Sun Jun 16, 2002 10:43 pm

I came up with a new joke:

I group of musicians from the British Isles were in the USA, when a local bohdran player asked them what they found exotic about the US. They told him that they found driving disconcerting as they drive in the opposite direction back home. The bohdran player got a thoughtful look on his face and said, "Isn't that rather hard on transmissions?"

[ This Message was edited by: Rod Sprague on 2002-06-17 00:44 ]

jim_mc · Post by **jim_mc** » Mon Jun 17, 2002 12:03 am

A man brings an octopus to his local session. Of course this piques everyone's interest.
"What's with the octopus?" Asks the fiddler.
"He can play any musical instrument," replies the man.
"$50 says he can't play the fiddle."
"You're on!"
The octopus plays the fiddle and the fiddler hands over the $50.
"Anyone else?" Asks the man.
"Surely he can't play my concertina," says one fellow, "I'll wager $50."
The octopus plays the concertina and the fellow pays up.
Finally the Uilleann piper speaks up, "I'll bet $50 he can't play these." The octopus straps on the pipes and begins writhing around, but no sound is heard.
The man says to his octopus, "Don't tell me you can't play that!"
The octopus replies, "Play it? No! I'm trying to mate with it!"

rossmpfc13 · Post by **rossmpfc13** » Tue Jun 18, 2002 5:43 pm

On 2002-06-17 02:03, jim_mc wrote:
The octopus replies, "Play it? No! I'm trying to mate with it!"

A better ending would be for Highland pipes; and for the octpous to say, "Play it? I'm gonna screw it once I get it out of its pajamas!"

Sorry about my twisted sense of humor, but I just had to say that...
-Ross

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 1:56 pm

Q: How many bassists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None. The organist can do that with her feet.

Q: How many electric guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Ten. One to change it and nine to reminisce about how much better the old tubes were.

Q: How many Reggae musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Light bulb? Oh, No! We spent all de money on spliffs, mon!

thurlowe · Post by **thurlowe** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 3:53 pm

Not exactly a whistle-related joke, but this little straight-faced paragraph always cracks me up. I got it from a friend in Canada:

"To be a good artist takes very little. Art is a shell. Appearance is important. So, first of all, you need to wear black ... Second, if you want to be a really great artist, you need to drink alcohol. That is why British art is so good these days. Because British artists drink like ponies.
Third, you must stop believing that art is about self-expression. Art is a job. An occupation. Art is not about freedom. Art is about repetition. Affirmation. Your whole life must be devoted to one stupid thing."
-- Alex Lispenard

I shared it with a music prof at the university where we work and she laughed so hard she plans to put it in her syllabus.

AnnaDMartinez · Post by **AnnaDMartinez** » Wed Jun 19, 2002 5:38 pm

On 2002-06-19 17:53,
"To be a good artist takes very little. Art is a shell. Appearance is important. So, first of all, you need to wear black ... Second, if you want to be a really great artist, you need to drink alcohol. That is why British art is so good these days. Because British artists drink like ponies.
Third, you must stop believing that art is about self-expression. Art is a job. An occupation. Art is not about freedom. Art is about repetition. Affirmation. Your whole life must be devoted to one stupid thing."
-- Alex Lispenard

I am still laughing hysterically 25 minutes later!

Rod Sprague · Post by **Rod Sprague** » Thu Jun 20, 2002 8:09 pm

Art humor isn't off topic; musicianship is an art, after all.

nbrock · Post by **nbrock** » Fri Jun 21, 2002 1:32 pm

I saw a very funny "visual" bagpipe cartoon at:

http://www.comics.com/comics/randolphit ... 20521.html

This is the 30th day of a 30-day archive. So look quick. I don't know how long it will be there. If it's unavailable, email me and I'll send you the gif file.

Neil

Rod Sprague · Post by **Rod Sprague** » Mon Jun 24, 2002 2:07 am

I recently heard another accordionist joke, this one told by accordionists; accordions don't play Lady of Spain, people do! I told this to the accordionist that played in church Sunday during Humor Sunday (I'm a Unitarian Universalist, we do heretical things like tell bad jokes in church as part of the service) and we realized you could use just about any strongly worded political slogan as an instrument joke!