Chanukah greetings from Walmart

[Walden]

a years supply of sodium per slice.

Oh, pshaw! The oldest people I know ate salt pork every day, which is way more salty than ham, and they lived to be right old.

[dwest]

a years supply of sodium per slice.

Oh, pshaw! The oldest people I know ate salt pork every day, which is way more salty than ham, and they lived to be right old.

I'm just commenting on the volume of salt in this ham, not porker life expectancies. Most folks soak it for two to three days before cooking. If you threw a single ham into a fresh water lake you could float higher than you would in the Great Salt Lake in just a few days. Sure Paula Dean may eat it after a 24 hour soak but she don't know nothin' 'bout cooking Virginia hams.

[chas]

Many years ago a friend insisted that he baked his Virginia ham without soaking it. I was skeptical, but he grew up in Waverly, so had a bit of cred. He had an annual party in the late winter/early spring, so we agreed that I'd bring a platter of ham that I'd soaked for a week and he'd have a platter that he hadn't soaked. There honestly wasn't that much difference, and people generally liked his better. In my defense, I probably cooked a Jamestown or Gwaltney and he probably had real Smithfield. (The factor of two-plus in price was a deal breaker for the graduate student.)

I knew another guy whose grandfather had his wife sneak country ham biscuits into the hospital for him. When he was recovering from his second multiple bypass. Gotta admire the guy's spunk. He was in his 80's, so it's not like he died young because of his recklessness.

[mutepointe]

The only reason to buy a Gwaltney is to distract people from the real ham that you're eating in private.

(My Mom dried my Grandfather out when he was 90 (and could no longer walk and gain access to alcohol.) He lived the last 14 years of his life proud of his sobriety.)

[dwest]

The only reason to buy a Gwaltney is to distract people from the real ham that you're eating in private.

(My Mom dried my Grandfather out when he was 90 (and could no longer walk and gain access to alcohol.) He lived the last 14 years of his life proud of his sobriety.)

The only real southern ham is Edwards ham, all the others are wannabes. I found numerous dried out folks when I worked in the Southwest. It's always amazing how quickly it can happen in a high heat, low humidity environment. Often looked just like a smoked southern ham without the muslin bag.

[Nanohedron]

I found numerous dried out folks when I worked in the Southwest. It's always amazing how quickly it can happen in a high heat, low humidity environment. Often looked just like a smoked southern ham without the muslin bag.

You might think otherwise, but apparently Florida's actually good for that sort of thing, too, rainy season notwithstanding. Mom had a sun-worshipping neighbor who looked like jerky on legs. That's what I called her: The Jerky Lady. Every time, folks would know who I was talking about without me having to point.

[mutepointe]

When you point, three fingers are pointing back at you.

[Nanohedron]

I hope you're aware how drearily prim that makes a person sound. Plus it's right up there with "Who smelt it, dealt it".

[Denny]

prim, what a wonderful choice!


He's been watching Paul Reubens again, hasn't he?

[Nanohedron]

prim, what a wonderful choice!

Stick around, kiddo. I've got a million of 'em.

He's been watching Paul Reubens again, hasn't he?

Well, I don't hang out in Mute's living room, but yeah, you'd think so.

[Denny]

prim, what a wonderful choice!

Stick around, kiddo. I've got a million of 'em.

[emmline]

I found numerous dried out folks when I worked in the Southwest. It's always amazing how quickly it can happen in a high heat, low humidity environment. Often looked just like a smoked southern ham without the muslin bag.

You might think otherwise, but apparently Florida's actually good for that sort of thing, too, rainy season notwithstanding. Mom had a sun-worshipping neighbor who looked like jerky on legs. That's what I called her: The Jerky Lady. Every time, folks would know who I was talking about without me having to point.

I'm pretty sure some of them make it as far north as North Carolina, where we beach each summer. The girls like an annual trip to a particular bikini shop, and I remember seeing a woman there last year who was, most likely, not older than I, but...wowzer. I sure hope she enjoyed her tan. The word "tan" was doubly applicable, in fact. Made me go home and use extra sunscreen.

[dwest]

I found numerous dried out folks when I worked in the Southwest. It's always amazing how quickly it can happen in a high heat, low humidity environment. Often looked just like a smoked southern ham without the muslin bag.

You might think otherwise, but apparently Florida's actually good for that sort of thing, too, rainy season notwithstanding. Mom had a sun-worshipping neighbor who looked like jerky on legs. That's what I called her: The Jerky Lady. Every time, folks would know who I was talking about without me having to point.

I'm pretty sure some of them make it as far north as North Carolina, where we beach each summer. The girls like an annual trip to a particular bikini shop, and I remember seeing a woman there last year who was, most likely, not older than I, but...wowzer. I sure hope she enjoyed her tan. The word "tan" was doubly applicable, in fact. Made me go home and use extra sunscreen.

Oh! I get it! Youse guys are talking about people still breathing. BTW when I point a finger at someone my other three fingers are pointing to either someone to my left or my other left. My distal phalanges are usually curled into my palm. In West Virginia there's no telling what goes on with that fifth finger they have.

[mutepointe]

I hope you're aware how drearily prim that makes a person sound. Plus it's right up there with "Who smelt it, dealt it".

Do you know any prim folks who say, "Who smelt it, dealth it."? They must be incredibly prim.

Well, I don't hang out in Mute's living room...

But you want to.

[Nanohedron]

I hope you're aware how drearily prim that makes a person sound. Plus it's right up there with "Who smelt it, dealt it".

Do you know any prim folks who say, "Who smelt it, dealth it."? They must be incredibly prim.

We could discuss - in armchair fashion, of course - the psychology behind redirecting blame for embarrassing instances of flatulence, but as you suggest, it's enough to say some people are just plain muck-savage trashy, period, and leave it at that. No, what I was really more getting at was the comparatively similar level and mode of discourse. Glad that's cleared up.

Well, I don't hang out in Mute's living room...

But you want to.

It's true. Got beer?