Devondancer update

devondancer · Post by **devondancer** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 10:44 am

I went in early this morning to see Lesley's consultant, after a phone call from the ward to request it. They were very worried about the continued high temp and blood pressure, as these may mean that the body is rejecting the new heart. Their options included very high doses of an antibiotic that is apparently likely to cause all sorts of side effects, and of course Lesley is not good with antibiotics. They wanted to know how I felt about this treatment. Not an easy question, after Lesley's earlier medication-induced collapses. I asked what other options there were, and there was not much. Most had already been tried - she is already on high doses of anti-rejection drugs, steroids, other antibiotics and other things I can't remember.

I couldn't make that decision for Lesley, and said so. The consultant and I both went to see her, and she knew immediately that something was wrong. I expect, knowing her, she already knew. She is at a disadvantage that way! He explained, and she said at once, "If Ro is happy to try, please try it. I don't want this heart to be wasted after someone has given it to me." So they did, and after a day on it, via her infusion, her temperature is almost normal and her blood pressure is also coming down. And so far, she is not reacting to it. I have seen the consultant again this evening and he is very pleased with her now. What a relief. She is such a brave lady. I have a feeling she will make it now.

While I was sitting quietly with her later on, Lesley gave me the papers she has been scribbling on. This is her latest effort:

This is so strange.
I am still me,
Yet the heart of one I never knew
Is now a part of me,
Keeping me here,
Keeping me me.

I don’t know how to deal with this.
Too big a thing to see
Why someone made the choice to leave
This gift of life to me.
I’m frightened, lost. I can’t see how
To earn the gift you made.
You’re trusting me to use it well,
Not waste the price you paid.

Just now to live the best I can
Is all that I can do,
As every day that I survive
I live for me and you.
And if at last I dance again -
I hope to, in the end -
Then I will dance with greatest joy
For you, my unknown friend.

This is so strange.
I am still me,
Yet the heart of one I never knew
Is now a part of me,
Keeping me here,
Keeping me me.

My wonderful wife.
Ro

HDSarah · Post by **HDSarah** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 10:50 am

This is wonderful news! I am so happy for you both!

Now, who had the tissue box last? I think we need to pass it round again.

susnfx · Post by **susnfx** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 10:53 am

That's absolutely beautiful, Roland. If you can't hug her yet, please squeeze her hand from me.

Susan

anniemcu · Post by **anniemcu** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 11:29 am

May she prevail!!

(Opening another box of Puffs, and handing it 'round)

Cork · Post by **Cork** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 12:01 pm

This has been a virtual roller coaster of events, frankly, as just when things were looking up, down they would go, and so on, the highs, and the lows.

However, there seems to be something solid to this latest news.

The heart being such a close and personal thing, I can only imagine what Lesley could be experiencing, as profound, no doubt.

However, it appears that she still sees herself as being herself, and that's a good thing.

Whew!

:-)

emmline · Post by **emmline** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 12:40 pm

That's something, isn't it? As Cork said, we can only imagine how she feels, but her attitude and insight continue to inspire.

missy · Post by **missy** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 2:34 pm

where's the Puffs?

That is so beautiful. And I"m sure her donor is smiling, too.

Martin Milner · Post by **Martin Milner** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 2:50 pm

missy wrote:where's the Puffs?

That is so beautiful. And I"m sure her donor is smiling, too.

Mmmh, cheesy puffs, Marks & Spencers' are the best, but wouldn't a box of tissues be more appropriate, if less tasty?

brewerpaul · Post by **brewerpaul** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 3:54 pm

Wow...

peeplj · Post by **peeplj** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 4:10 pm

Good news.

Even an old blowhard like me might need some Puffs after reading that.

Warmest healing thoughts to you both.

--James

mutepointe · Post by **mutepointe** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 4:17 pm

You two are a treasure to us.

missy · Post by **missy** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 4:22 pm

Martin Milner wrote:
missy wrote:where's the Puffs?

That is so beautiful. And I"m sure her donor is smiling, too.
Mmmh, cheesy puffs, Marks & Spencers' are the best, but wouldn't a box of tissues be more appropriate, if less tasty?

Martin, dear, I work at Procter and Gamble. They are not tissues, or god forbid, kleenex. They are Puffs!!

Cork · Post by **Cork** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 4:33 pm

mutepointe wrote:You two are a treasure to us.

Indeed, this is one heck of a way for Lesley to introduce Roland!

But, I'm glad they're both here.

:-)

izzarina · Post by **izzarina** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 4:36 pm

mutepointe wrote:You two are a treasure to us.

Yes you are....very nice way to put it, mute!

cowtime · Post by **cowtime** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 5:57 pm

I'm sure we are all so relieved to hear this latest, and will continue our efforts on her behalf.

I do hope you are keeping all her writing, to be bound at some time. Profound.

And you know, this thread will serve as a diary of sorts for her to wade through if she ever wants. I know you've kept her up to date, but considering what she's going through, I could imagine her wanting to look at it again much later when the healing is complete.