Do not start the day like this.....

[cowtime]

Today as I drove to work, down the "river road", very little traffic,no houses just a dirt road along the river, I came upon a school bus and a van parked in the road behind it. The bus driver got out as I stopped and walked past the van to my jeep. To make this short, there was a man lying across the seat in the van. The driver had radioed the authorities and wanted to get the bus load of kids out of there. I stayed with the man until the rescue squad and police got there. He was obviously dead and had been dead for several hours- with vehicle running, lights on, foot on the brake. We still have heard no word on who he is or what happened. No one recognized the vehicle or the man(unusual around here-we all know everyone). Had he been on any other road, there would have been traffic and he might have been discovered in time to help him. Since he was on an little-traveled backroad and had fallen over into the passenger seat I guess the few who did see the van thought it was empty. It was very sad, but I thought that at least his last sights were of the river, the woods and the beauty of this world as opposed to a hospital setting.

May he rest in peace.

[anniemcu]

Wow... tough one on everyone involved, I'd bet. Sorry you had to start your day that way, and he had to end his. Rest his soul.

[Flyingcursor]

Nope. Not a way to start the day.

[chas]

Geez, CT, that had to have been rough. I hope you and the gentleman's loved ones find some inner peace.

[Joseph E. Smith]

Geez, CT, that had to have been rough. I hope you and the gentleman's loved ones find some inner peace.

Ditto.

[Tyler]

Sorry 'bout the bad start...




if it's any consolation...
that would make a hellova good start to a mystery novel! Guy found dead by postal worker and school bus driver still behind the wheel of his vehicle, car running, foot on the brake... Nobody knows what killed him....

oooooo eeeeeeeeeeee oooooooooo

[springrobin]

How about this one- A guy pulls his old Jeep off the road and passes out at the wheel without turning the ignition off. The steering is turned all the way over to the right I think and the friction on the belt eventually causes a fire that consumes the interior- at least that's the theory. The scene is completely cold before anyone realizes there's a body in the vehicle- maybe days. I don't recall that anyone had even reported he guy missing.

[Tyler]

either that, or the dead guy in the car idles in circles until the vehicle runs out of gas... everyone's afraid to try and step in and get the car to stop, so they wait until it dies.

[Doug_Tipple]

With every death there are loved ones who will morn, and righty so. However, if you are going to have a heart attack while driving a car, the reported case of a stopped car on a country road with a dead driver seems like a best-case scenario. There was no accident, and no innocent people were injured.

My father insisted on driving when he was 90 years old. His attitude was that if he ran into a tree and killed himself, it wouldn't make any difference. He never considered the very real possibility that he might run into another car and injure or kill someone else besides himself. Seeing him pull out the drive onto the the highway without even stopping, I called the department of motor vehicles and requested that he be tested (written and driving) before he was allowed to drive again. Of course, when he got the letter, he was angry. He thought that the neighbors had turned him in. He knew that he couldn't pass the vision or the driving test, so that was the end of his driving career. He passed on a few months later, and his car is now 900 miles away, being driven by his grandson at college.

[djm]

that was the end of his driving career. He passed on a few months later

What's the use of living if you don't have your driver's license?

djm

[gonzo914]

Sorry 'bout the bad start...

if it's any consolation...
that would make a hellova good start to a mystery novel! Guy found dead by postal worker and school bus driver still behind the wheel of his vehicle, car running, foot on the brake... Nobody knows what killed him....

oooooo eeeeeeeeeeee oooooooooo

Ooh, ooh, ooh -- How about this --

The setting is the Annual Chiff and Fipple Combination Conference, Wing-ding and Hoorah at the Gobbler. After a suitable number of expository chapters to give everyone a motive, the Undisputed is found dead in the sidecar of his running, Genuine Stella scooter, clutching in his hands a harmonica, a bottle of Ocean Spray juice, a papal bull, a hand-made reed, and an assortment of other junk guaranteed to implicate just about anyone. And it is up to Nano to find out who done it.

Nano, of course, establishes that everyone has an alibi, everyone, that is, except the dashing, debonair and sophisticated gonzo (Think Cary Grant in Mr. Lucky, although gonzo is shorter, and less slender, and doesn't dress quite so well or have an English accent, but who, unlike Cary grant, is not dead). Gonzo, though he has no motive, nonetheless declines to tell where he was at the time of the crime because to do so would compromise the honor of whoever we decide to portray as the female romantic lead (Apply within), and gonzo is nothing if not a gentleman.

The urbane and polished gonzo constantly thwarts Nano's investigation with his witty repartee and badinage, as in this except --

Nano: Where were you last night at 8:00?
gonzo: I was where any sensible person would be -- in the bar.
Nano: Can you prove that?
gonzo: Can anyone ever really prove they've been in the bar?
Nano: You say you were there at 8:00. How do you know what time it was?
gonzo: I looked at my watch.
Nano: Couldn't it have been earlier?
gonzo: Why, yes, it could have been earlier -- if I had been in Hawaii.

After several chapters of this, the mystery will be solved by Bloomfield, doing the very best Lord Peter imitation he can muster up. I can't reveal the ending here, other than to say that gonzo, as the prime suspect, is of course, innocent.

What do you think, Tyler? Is it too late for you to start over?

[Bloomfield]

After several chapters of this, the mystery will be solved by Bloomfield, doing the very best Lord Peter imitation he can muster up.

sorry, but I'm busy upstairs growing orchids.

I can't reveal the ending here, other than to say that gonzo, as the prime suspect, is of course, innocent.

You may not have done in that particular Undiputed, but gonzo innocent? Riiiiiiight.

[djm]

Think Cary Grant in Mr. Lucky

Actually, I was thinking of Charles Laughton in He's Not a Real Modo.


I, of course, will reprise my now-famous role as a somewhat unknown, but potentially brilliant, Japanese film producer.


djm

[Nanohedron]

Sorry 'bout the bad start...

if it's any consolation...
that would make a hellova good start to a mystery novel! Guy found dead by postal worker and school bus driver still behind the wheel of his vehicle, car running, foot on the brake... Nobody knows what killed him....

oooooo eeeeeeeeeeee oooooooooo

Ooh, ooh, ooh -- How about this --

The setting is the Annual Chiff and Fipple Combination Conference, Wing-ding and Hoorah at the Gobbler. After a suitable number of expository chapters to give everyone a motive, the Undisputed is found dead in the sidecar of his running, Genuine Stella scooter, clutching in his hands a harmonica, a bottle of Ocean Spray juice, a papal bull, a hand-made reed, and an assortment of other junk guaranteed to implicate just about anyone. And it is up to Nano to find out who done it.

Nano, of course, establishes that everyone has an alibi, everyone, that is, except the dashing, debonair and sophisticated gonzo (Think Cary Grant in Mr. Lucky, although gonzo is shorter, and less slender, and doesn't dress quite so well or have an English accent, but who, unlike Cary grant, is not dead). Gonzo, though he has no motive, nonetheless declines to tell where he was at the time of the crime because to do so would compromise the honor of whoever we decide to portray as the female romantic lead (Apply within), and gonzo is nothing if not a gentleman.

The urbane and polished gonzo constantly thwarts Nano's investigation with his witty repartee and badinage, as in this except --

Nano: Where were you last night at 8:00?
gonzo: I was where any sensible person would be -- in the bar.
Nano: Can you prove that?
gonzo: Can anyone ever really prove they've been in the bar?
Nano: You say you were there at 8:00. How do you know what time it was?
gonzo: I looked at my watch.
Nano: Couldn't it have been earlier?
gonzo: Why, yes, it could have been earlier -- if I had been in Hawaii.

After several chapters of this, the mystery will be solved by Bloomfield, doing the very best Lord Peter imitation he can muster up. I can't reveal the ending here, other than to say that gonzo, as the prime suspect, is of course, innocent.

What do you think, Tyler? Is it too late for you to start over?

And at the conclusion of his investigation, Nano determined that "The Undisputed" expired of a surfeit of general and rampant hijinks. He couldn't explain the harmonica.

[gonzo914]

After several chapters of this, the mystery will be solved by Bloomfield, doing the very best Lord Peter imitation he can muster up.

sorry, but I'm busy upstairs growing orchids.

That will work, too. We'll get you a room at the Gobbler for the orchids, and you can send Nano Goodwin out to interview the suspects. I'm sure gonzo can ditch the Mr. Lucky and can dig up a Lord Peter in one of his many personalities, especially if we can locate a suitable Harriet Vane (position is still open and applications are still being accepted).

I can't reveal the ending here, other than to say that gonzo, as the prime suspect, is of course, innocent.

You may not have done in that particular Undiputed, but gonzo innocent? Riiiiiiight.

We've already established that, but gonzo has forgiven himself. Papal prerogative, don't you know? (Damn, I dropped my monocle again.)