Aarrr! Don't Forrrget!

Feadan · Post by **Feadan** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 6:41 am

One evening at the Shanty sing my son pulled the sort of obvious, but still funny, gag of singing the last chorus (after the wotsit verse) in a falsetto. Had several of us in stitches of laughter so much that we couldn't sing the last chorus ourselves

gonzo914 · Post by **gonzo914** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:15 am

A fine piratey read -- Pirates of Pensacola.

The Cooke and Hood families have been at each other’s throats since the Spanish Main days. The latest chapter in their piratic rivalry takes place in 2004, when an old treasure map turns up. None of this seems to matter to Morgan Cooke, a cowardly, landlubbing accountant entirely ignorant of his heritage until his estranged father, Isaac, in need of crewmen, kidnaps him and thrusts him into the fray. When Morgan wakes up on a boat in the middle of the Caribbean, he learns that piracy still flourishes, albeit with far more discretion than in the old days—pirates disguise their fast boats as shrimpers or tugs—but with no less bloodshed. Judging even a shot at riches vastly preferable to a return to his lonely, fluorescent-lit workstation existence, Morgan sets sail for glorious adventure.

Very much in the spirit of Carl Hiaasen and Tim Dorsey, but with a tad less gore.

Wanderer · Post by **Wanderer** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:40 am

I don't usually promote my website here much, but I think in this case it may be appropriate

Oops.."Yarr, me hearties! Me don' be spreadin' about me own bloodthirsty reputation', but I tell ye straight, this be a good time for it!"

Oh, blow the man down, bullies, blow the man down
To me way aye blow the man down
Oh, blow the man down, bullies, blow the man down
Give me some time to blow the man down!

As I was walking down Paradise Street
A pretty young damsel I chanced for to meet.

She was round in the counter and bluff in the bow.
So I took in all said and cried, "Way enough now."

So I tailed her my flipper and took her in tow.
And yardarm to yardarm away we did go.

But as we were going she said unto me,
"There's a spanking full-rigger just ready for sea."
But as soon as that packet was clear of the bar,
The mate knocked me down with the end of a spar.

It's starboard and larboard on deck you will sprawl,
For Kicking Jack Williams commands the Black Ball

So I give you fair warning before we belay,
Dont' ever take heed of what pretty girls say.

Jayhawk · Post by **Jayhawk** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 8:23 am

I quite liked Pirates of Pensacola. I also just finished Gus Openshaw's Whale Killing Journal...a bit derivative of his first book (heck, he lifted entire sentences from one book and plopped them down in the second) but fun nonetheless.

Eric (AKA Iron Tom Cash per the pirate name program)

fearfaoin · Post by **fearfaoin** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 8:31 am

Avast there mates, ye're sailin' with Long John Black-Beard,
Peg-Leg, Patch-Eye Hook, da scourge of da boundin' main.
Bloodthirstiest, black-heartedest pirate captain what ever sailed
the seven seas, haarrrr! What say ye we hoist the Jolly Roger,
heel over ta yonder Spanish galleon, lay a few broadsides agin'
her timers, swing over on these here lanyards with our cutlasses
in our teeth, cut 'em to ribbons, and split the booty!
What say ye to that, me hearties? Heh! Har, har, haarrrrr!

I don't like it....

You don't like it?

I don't like it and I won't do it. It's tacky!
Tacky, tacky... and don't look at me that way

Well, if you don't like it, what do you want?

I want to sing and dance, I want to sing and dance!
I want to be a pirate in the Pirates of Penzance...
Wear me silver-buckled slippers and me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance!

etc, ad nauseum.

Loren · Post by **Loren** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 9:28 am

Man, my poor old, and obviously long departed, relative Sir Francis Drake is probably spinning like a fully gimbaled compass in his grave right now.......

Loren

Tyler · Post by **Tyler** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 9:31 am

Loren wrote:Man, my poor old, and obviously long departed, relative Sir Francis Drake is probably spinning like a fully gimbaled compass in his grave right now.......

Loren

May FSM rest his soul...

Loren · Post by **Loren** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 9:47 am

Heh heh, you just gotta know how all the hollywood pirate speak would offend his proper English Privateer sensibilities

Loren

anniemcu · Post by **anniemcu** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 10:00 am

jsluder wrote:
fearfaoin wrote:Have the Flying Spaghetti Monster adherents adopted this as a Holy Day yet?
Yep. From Boing Boing: FSM roundup:
Regarding Pastafarian holidays, BB reader Keith Kisser says:

The holiest of holidays for Pastafarrians, is of course the birthday of His Most Holy Prophet, Marco Polo (b. sept 15, 1254), who brought the word of his Noodly Appendage back from the East.

As Talk Like A Pirate Day falls on September 19th, this five day period constitutes Holy Pasta Week, durring which spaghetti is consumed liberally. With a nice chianti, of course.

Arrr... seems we be settlin' fer a bite of lasagners astead o' spaggetti wi the grog ternight... 'll do. Keep yer grubbies out'n it er cookie'll lump yer noggin and harvest yer spares fer tomorry's slop!

Tommy · Post by **Tommy** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 10:31 am

AARRRRrrr I e be known to the seas as ''Captain Terrrifying Tommmy Terrrific''. Lower yer flag and save your self.

mutepointe · Post by **mutepointe** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 3:32 pm

what's a pirate's favorite evening out? an rrrrr rated movie and dinner at arrrrrby's.

scottielvr · Post by **scottielvr** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 4:00 pm

Arrrr, me horn-swogglin mateys... after a busy day o' pillagin' and a celebratory tot o' grog or three, ye kin always relax in yer quarters and knit like a pirate. Make ye a gunner's cap, or a vast stripey scaaaaaarrrrf.

The Weekenders · Post by **The Weekenders** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 4:54 pm

Pillage the Rubber Room, I say!!! Aaaaargh!!! Threads away!!!!

Cynth · Post by **Cynth** » Tue Sep 19, 2006 9:23 pm

AAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!! What sort of stinkin' addlepated nonsense be this? Scurvy Gums Jean??? Scupper that software ye sons o' biscuit eaters. Ye jest call me Corsair Cat and ye'll get yer share o' the swaggy. Let me set the sproggies to learnin' knittin' like a pirate and then we'll get up the grog fer all ye old sea dogs and, er..., lambs? AARRR!!!

Miwokhill · Post by **Miwokhill** » Wed Sep 20, 2006 12:08 am

Aye now, we had a lot of wee blagards come to the door last halloween begging as they will for sweets...I suspect it's the parents lurking out on the path that puts the tykes up to it but seeing as it's only the one day I go along with their extortion...One wee lad wearing a headgear that reminded me of Capn' Crunch stood leering with his sack full of booty. A comical sight, I went along mostly to get rid of the scurvy little dog and said 'well now Capn', where are your buccaneers?' He looks up and says 'Under me buckin' hat'.

cheeky wee ba*#@*#.