Help! Going to a Bat Mitzvah

[djm]

I had come down with shingles earlier in the week

Why Lamby, do you do roofs too?

djm

[Lambchop]

I had come down with shingles earlier in the week

Why Lamby, do you do roofs too?

djm

Sweetness, I have all sorts of useful skills. My father didn't want me to grow up to be at the mercy of repairmen.

[Cynth]

I've always wondered about the Yarmulkas. Is it OK for non-Jewish
men to wear them at Jewish ceremonies? I would've assumed it
would be insulting to do so, but I guess not...

I think my husband and I would have thought we shouldn't participate in a custom that we didn't belong to, so I can see what you mean. But at this event the usher certainly knew that many non-Jewish friends were coming, so I guess it is appreciated if a man, no matter what his beliefs, will cover his head. If we are invited to another service like this I imagine we would go as we are (my husband doesn't own a hat that would be appropriate) and then assume that we would be helped at the door if there was something we should wear. It really was quite wonderful. I had never been in a synagogue before. The young man read a lot of things in Hebrew---I think he learned more than the minimum requirement, although I could be wrong there---he did such a good job and was really working away very intensely. Then the parents and both sets of grandparents did things. One set of grandparents was Christian and they had arranged for them to participate in a nice way. It was all actually quite moving.

[Tyghress]

Stand when other people stand. If there is a silent prayer and some people start sitting, you can sit then too.

There is a possibility that there will be candy throwing (yes, during the service) and a shout of Mazel Tov.

In general the rule is to cover your head in the house of God, but reform synagogues are very lax on this.

The book may open from the opposite side, so when the cantor says to turn to a particular page, remember it may be backward. When she chants her haftorah you swap books, but you don't really have to, as there won't be any responsive reading or congregational participation (except for the prayers before and after.

If the Torah is carried through the synagogue, you may see people touch the scrolls with a prayer book then kiss the book. This is not required or expected (or forbidden or discouraged) of people who don't know this custom.

Congrats and mazel tov are also appropriate to the parents.

Have a good time!

[Rod Sprague]

I am the soundman for the Unitarian Universalist Church of the Palouse. On the Palouse, we have the University of Idaho and Washington State University eight miles apart, so we have a relatively large Jewish community, for a relatively rural inland northwest region. There is a feeling among many Unitarian Universalists that when other religions use our space, that that is a sanctification of the space. I feel it is my holy duty to run sound if people performing a religious function (or even simple social gathering) want me to, so I get to sit in on many of the Jewish holy events. My first was a Bat Mitzvah. The Torah “lives” in its big ark in the church when a Jewish event is coming up, making me feel like we are greatly trusted. There are even a number of people in the Jewish community that also come to our services, as we feel attending or joining our church does not negate your membership in another religion your convictions tell you you belong to.

The members of the Jewish community I interact with are vary open minded, so I have trouble imagining any truly serious faux pas if someone simply stays mindful without getting up tight about it. But that is good advice in most any social situation.

Rod