Danger: Dihydrogen monoxide

[Jack]

BAN DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE!

Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:

* is also known as hydroxl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
* contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
* may cause severe burns.
* contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
* accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
* may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
* has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.

Contamination is reaching epidemic proportions!

Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. DHMO has caused millions of dollars of property damage in the midwest, and recently California.

Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:

* as an industrial solvent and coolant.
* in nuclear power plants.
* in the production of styrofoam.
* as a fire retardant.
* in many forms of cruel animal research.
* in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
* as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.

Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!

The American federal government has refused to ban the production, distribution, or use of this damaging chemical due to its "importance to the economic health of this nation." In fact, the navy and other military organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations. Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a highly sophisticated underground distribution network. Many store large quantities for later use.

Should we ban dihydrogen monoxide?

[Dale]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

[Jeferson]

[Innocent Bystander]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

It's even worse trying to get it in its solid state.

[Lambchop]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

It's even worse trying to get it in its solid state.

This has the potential for both . . .

[Dale]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

It's even worse trying to get it in its solid state.

That's RIGHT! There's none anywhere!

[scottielvr]

Should we ban dihydrogen monoxide?

This is a mixed bag from a public policy standpoint: Increased dihydrogen monoxide use can have ill effects on the health of the population. However, if it were banned, it would likely result in yet another failed paternalistic government intervention. One solution gaining popularity is to permit possession of dihydrogen monoxide in small, personal-use quantities and impose heavy taxes on the substance. This way, governments could control how much dihydrogen monoxide is consumed by increasing or decreasing the taxes on the product. There is a limit to this, however, as setting taxes too high will cause dihydrogen monoxide producers to sell on the black market to avoid excessive taxation. It's a difficult question. However, with governments scrambling to find new sources of revenue to pay for important social objectives such as health care and education, expect to see the idea raised in Congress sooner rather than later.

[dubhlinn]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

They sell it outside football stadiums in Germany.

Slan,
D.

[Innocent Bystander]

The problem with trying to get legislation like this through Congress, is that all kinds of people are going to try to water it down.

[brewerpaul]

Cranberry, I think you're all wet!

[Congratulations]

This thread makes me giggle.

[izzarina]

...and they don't serve this stuff with meals in England.

They sell it outside football stadiums in Germany.

Slan,
D.

<snerk>

[Wanderer]

I don't want to rain on anyone's parade, but I'm all for legalizing the recreational use of dihydrogen monoxide.

[Rod Sprague]

Banning it is nuts! When I was a professional custodian, it was our cleaning solvent of choice. When used correctly, it is as safe as mother’s milk. Yes, there is an inhalation danger, but with proper supervision and instruction, children play in it at special municipal facilities. The simple cough reflex is enough to clear moderate amounts out of the system if it is accidentally inhaled. My childhood would have been much poorer if I hadn’t been allowed to play in volumes more than deep enough to completely submerge myself in!

Rod

[emmline]

I admit to being such a lush that I imbibe it in copious quantities all day long.