What's so great about being 50?

IDAwHOa · Post by **IDAwHOa** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 10:21 pm

Not that I am or anything, but I am getting close.

PERKS OF BEING OVER 50

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

4. People call at 9 pm and ask, " Did I wake you?"

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat dinner at 4 pm.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.

11. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

12. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

13. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

14. You sing along with elevator music.

15. Your eyes won't get much worse.

16. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

17. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

18. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

19. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

20. You can't remember who sent you this list.

And you notice this was typed in Big Print for your convenience.

SteveShaw · Post by **SteveShaw** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 4:42 am

"Will you please stop telling me what to do - I'm 55, for God's sake!"

gonzo914 · Post by **gonzo914** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 6:29 am

One of the nice things about turning 50 is that those 19- and 20-year-old girls, to whom you became invisible when you turned 30, now can see you again, and they open doors for you and call you "sir."

buddhu · Post by **buddhu** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 6:42 am

"What's so great about being 50?"

Oy, I've got 4 more years yet. Don't rush me...

Charlene · Post by **Charlene** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:13 pm

50 wasn't bad. 51 is going OK so far.

Only 8-1/2 more years until I can start taking $$ out of my individual retirement account!

The Weekenders · Post by **The Weekenders** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:25 pm

I love #9. Though reluctant to admit it, I could finally probably handle celibacy and the monastic life at this point. But definitely not without my glasses..

dwinterfield · Post by **dwinterfield** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:28 pm

50 is the point at which it becomes pretty much impossible to argue that you're still got most of your life ahead of you. That's sort of a daunting realization and coming to grips with it is a bit of a challenge. I like to think of it as cresting a hill. Getting to th top was hard. Now that I'm going down the other side, I burn a littel less fuel. I can coast a bit when I want to. The view is much better because I can see much further into to the distance. Enjoy.

brewerpaul · Post by **brewerpaul** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 1:42 pm

I'm just shy of 56, and I REALLY like where I am right now. I think I'm wiser than I ever was, with a better sense of what's really important in life.
50 itself was monumental, because I got my whistlemaking lathe for that birthday!

SteveK · Post by **SteveK** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 2:13 pm

At my age 50 sounds pretty good. Actually, the time between about 41 to 55 or so was the best since junior high school.

It strikes me that those of us of the older persuasion are about the last group for which it is politically correct to make statements like this

19. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

SteveShaw · Post by **SteveShaw** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 2:23 pm

Being over 50 is superb. You can drink red wine all night and every night and get a big belly, but still delude yourself into thinking that young nubile women (max. age 27) will still be magnetically attracted to you, not because of your figure but because of your brain and because of all the tenderness and experience you could endow upon them. If only they could see it...

Denny · Post by **Denny** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 3:27 pm

SteveShaw wrote:Being over 50 is superb. You can drink red wine all night and every night and get a big belly, but still delude yourself into thinking that young nubile women (max. age 27) will still be magnetically attracted to you, not because of your figure but because of your brain and because of all the tenderness and experience you could endow upon them. If only they could see it...

Steve that may be only if you dring red wine all night...

Lambchop · Post by **Lambchop** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 3:45 pm

I am six.

Denny · Post by **Denny** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 4:03 pm

Lambchop wrote:I am six.

ya don't look it kid

SteveShaw · Post by **SteveShaw** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 4:20 pm

Denny wrote:
Lambchop wrote:I am six.

ya don't look it kid

Now, Denny, you are getting your species confused here. Try to separate the sheep from the goats, willya?

Denny · Post by **Denny** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 5:06 pm

SteveShaw wrote:
Denny wrote:
Lambchop wrote:I am six.

ya don't look it kid
Now, Denny, you are getting your species confused here. Try to separate the sheep from the goats, willya?

and I thought that lamby would catch that first...