Heinz to field test instant beans on toast

[Denny]

Cutting edge of student dietary technology
International beanmonger HJ Heinz is to field test in New Zealand a frozen sandwich "beans on toast" combo which can be lovingly prepared by sticking it in the toaster for about a minute, The Guardian reports.

The new product - which we estimate will cut the amount of time the average university student spends cooking every evening by 50 per cent - reportedly features "a wodge of beans sealed in their frozen sauce between two slices of bread".

[Walden]

The new product - which we estimate will cut the amount of time the average university student spends cooking every evening by 50 per cent - reportedly features "a wodge of beans sealed in their frozen sauce between two slices of bread".

Scary times we're living in. It just goes to show that we're living in the last days.

[Nanohedron]

I wonder what a wodge is. Sounds pretty...um...unassailable.

[djm]

The new flavours look promising. I hope its not just in England.

djm

[Chiffed]

Sounds like the same mentality that puts 911 on speed dial.

[Denny]

Sounds like the same mentality that puts 911 on speed dial.

so...you think there is a target market!

[Innocent Bystander]

There are people who still eat pot-noodles, aren't there?

A wodge of beans... Hmm. Some kind of slip there, I hope.
A wodge of bread or toast, yes: a carelessly cut slice that isn't quite a slice and isn't exactly a wedge. A splodge of beans... maybe if it's beans on toast you can have a wodge.

Then they'll do a special slightly more expensive version that has beans on toast with the heel of the loaf!

They're making me hungry again!

[emmline]

I can picture a wodge in this context. It falls into the same category as what Einstein bagels calls a "shmear."
A wodge is an imprecisely measured, and somewhat unformed unit of a food that at least partially conforms to the shape of the item onto which it is deposited.

[Flyingcursor]

I can picture a wodge in this context. It falls into the same category as what Einstein bagels calls a "shmear."
A wodge is an imprecisely measured, and somewhat unformed unit of a food that at least partially conforms to the shape of the item onto which it is deposited.

Emmipedia at it's finest.


If the beans are anything like the atrocious red sauce things I ate in England I'll pass.

But it does give me an idea.

[Doug_Tipple]

The toaster-ready, bean sandwich sounds like a good idea to me, even if we are in the last days, as Walden suggests. My concern is for all the toasters, however. My mother was fond of raisin-cinnamon bread with heavy white sugar icing on top. Of course, we put slices of this bread in the toaster, and they were delicious. The only problem was with the icing that tended to flow while being toasted. After a few loaves of the cinnamon toast, the toaster was a mess. I don't know which would be easier to clean up: sticky bean paste or sugar icing.

With regard to Chiffed's reservation about putting 911 on speed dial, I have another concern. In the past 911 calls have been connected to a residential address. If you call 911 and say only "I need help", emergency personnel will go to the address from which that call was purportively made. However, if mobile cell phones continue to gain in popularity, how is the 911 operator going to know the location of the caller? It seems that the 911 operator's job is getting more complicated and stressful every day.

On a personal note, I once applied for a job as an emergency telephone operator for a rural fire department. It was in an area where there was a difficult labor market, so the room was full of applicants when I arrived to take the test. The test consisted of audio messages, difficult to understand and played at a fast rate of speed. It was a timed test, and we were supposed to write respond in writing on the test paper. It very soon became apparent to me that I was not qualified for the position in that I was not able to quickly discriminate the speech content and respond in writing. Younger women seemed to be the best at this task.

[missy]

However, if mobile cell phones continue to gain in popularity, how is the 911 operator going to know the location of the caller? It seems that the 911 operator's job is getting more complicated and stressful every day.

two ways - you can "triangulate" between the cell towers that picked up the signal (granted, takes time and not accurate at all)

newer phones have GPS and the technology is there (while individual departments may not have it) to pinpoint the position of a phone.

[SteveK]

An alternate spelling of wodge is wadge. I thought you should know that.

[jbarter]

A wodge just isn't enough to feed a growing boy. What it needs is a jowlin'.

[Innocent Bystander]

Jowlin', Jowlin', Jowlin', Jowlin'...

Ah'm a-beggin' of yuh, pleese don' take mah maaaaaan.....

[SteveShaw]

##A million housewives every day

Pick up a tin of beans and say

Beanz meanz fartz ##