Warning to C&Fers who aren't English or Australian

Montana · Post by **Montana** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:36 pm

GaryKelly wrote:It means we might be sorry that Pietersen dropped a catch that any five year-old could've held ("spilled an untaxing chance) while he was fielding at extra cover ("at extra cover"), just before tea. And the Pratt dropped Clarke before the Aussie was settled in.

To get one's eye in... to become accustomed to conditions. ...Except when bloody Pietersen is daydreaming out there.

Well, it all makes perfect sense when you explain it that way! The game definitely has its own language. I guess the sports commentators gotta do something while they're waiting for 5 days for a game to end...

TomB · Post by **TomB** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:38 pm

[quote="MontanaI guess the sports commentators gotta do something while they're waiting for 5 days for a game to end...[/quote]

Heh! Heh! Can you just imagine listening to Tim McCarver or Joe Morgan for five days? How about John Madden?

Tom

Montana · Post by **Montana** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:41 pm

TomB wrote:How about John Madden?
Tom

"And the bowler threw... WHOOSH...BAM!... as Clarke lobbed it up into extra cover...and PLOP! Peitersen drops it! The linebacker picked it up and went ZING here through the secondary (frantically scribbling X's and arrows on the board) running it in for a touchdown. POW!"

dubhlinn · Post by **dubhlinn** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:47 pm

I've just had an English friend E- Mail me with a simple guide to the game of Cricket.
It is all much clearer now.

"You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he is out. When they are all out, the side that's been out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out

"When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out, he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who are all out all the time, and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game."

Simple , innit!

Slan,
D.

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:54 pm

Clear as crystal... that's been smashed and ground to powder and mixed with mud.

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:57 pm

Well I turned out to be quite the pundit. The English tail did indeed wag as predicted. The track settled down although it was never a belter. The Aussie batsmen put up a better performance today but were still too inclined to pull on a pitch that was two paced and variable in height. Pieterson should have been at silly mid on of course, that would have made a difference. The game is now nicely poised. If the pitch breaks up tomorrow England are unlikely to reach the target, what with McGrath's indippers on a nagging length and Warnie's assortment of googlies, wrong 'uns and flippers. But if the pitch settles down further England might just get home, but it will be a hard ask.

Simple really.

TomB · Post by **TomB** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 1:59 pm

Wombat wrote:Well I turned out to be quite the pundit. The English tail did indeed wag as predicted. The track settled down although it was never a belter. The Aussie batsmen put up a better performance today but were still too inclined to pull on a pitch that was two paced and variable in height. Pieterson should have been at silly mid on of course, that would have made a difference. The game is now nicely poised. If the pitch breaks up tomorrow England are unlikely to reach the target, what with McGrath's indippers on a nagging length and Warnie's assortment of googlies, wrong 'uns and flippers. But if the pitch settles down further England might just get home, but it will be a hard ask.

Simple really.

Batman: Thanks for putting it in a way we foreigners can understand.

All the Best: Tom

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:18 pm

TomB wrote:

Batman: Thanks for putting it in a way we foreigners can understand.

All the Best: Tom

My pleasure Tom. Dub seemed to be deriving a perverse pleasure from making it seem difficult.

Just make sure you don't play down the Northern line if the ball's coming down the Bakerloo and she'll be apples, mate.

TomB · Post by **TomB** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:19 pm

Wombat wrote:
TomB wrote:

Batman: Thanks for putting it in a way we foreigners can understand.

All the Best: Tom
My pleasure Tom. Dub seemed to be deriving a perverse pleasure from making it seem difficult.

Just make sure you don't play down the Northern line if the ball's coming down the Bakerloo and she'll be apples, mate.

I've ridden both those lines many a time.

GaryKelly · Post by **GaryKelly** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:33 pm

Wombat wrote: Just make sure you don't play down the Northern line if the ball's coming down the Bakerloo and she'll be apples, mate.

And if our batsmen don't succeed in snatching defeat from the jaws of victory as they did yesterday, well then there's always the chance of rain this weekend to end the game in a draw, hurrah!

fearfaoin · Post by **fearfaoin** » Fri Jul 22, 2005 2:49 pm

I just love that the game commentary revolves around tea-time...
What does tea look like on the field? Do the players all sit togther and enjoy a relaxing
tea break, or do they go into their respective... uh ... locker ... rooms ... for a bit of a bashing
from the coach?

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Sat Jul 23, 2005 6:01 am

fearfaoin wrote:I just love that the game commentary revolves around tea-time...
What does tea look like on the field? Do the players all sit togther and enjoy a relaxing
tea break .....

You're getting the idea perfectly. When tea time arrives a marquee is hastily erected on the field of play and tea is served in fine china cups along with cucumber sandwiches and fairy cakes. If you have played especially well, you might get offered a Devonshire tea. If you played even better you might also be offered a Mars bar. If you played superbly well, you get to choose between gin and tonic with strawberries and cream and a pint of Fuller's London Pride with pork scratchings.

If you played really badly, you get to have tea with Prince Phillip.

GaryKelly · Post by **GaryKelly** » Sat Jul 23, 2005 6:39 am

Some might think that our chaps will be having tea with Prince Phillip.

However, I must point out that we have the Aussies exactly where we want them.

We now have two and a bit days in which to score a trifling 420 runs to win the match. The fact that no team in history has ever scored such a total in their last innings to win a Test is of course irrelevant; our fellows will simply view that particular statistic with typical British aplomb as they march steadily, stiff upper-lipped, to glory.

Meanwhile, I feel sure that our Australian counterparts are now desperately praying for rain and a draw.

GaryKelly · Post by **GaryKelly** » Sun Jul 24, 2005 4:02 am

The Aussies are saved! The Aussies are saved! It's raining!

perrins57 · Post by **perrins57** » Sun Jul 24, 2005 7:48 am

GaryKelly wrote:The Aussies are saved! The Aussies are saved! It's raining!

Yea I bet Warne and McGrath were shaking in their unassailable lead!