Slightly OT: a musical joke

[Lorenzo]

A Guy goes into a bar with his pet octopus and say's 'I bet $50 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus can't play'. The people in the bar look around and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus has a look, picks it up, tunes up the strings and starts playing the guitar. The octopus's owner pockets the fifty bucks.

Next guy comes up with a trumpet, octopus takes the horn, loosens up the keys, licks it's lips and starts playing a jazz solo. The guy hands over another fifty bucks to the octopus's owner.

The bar owner has been watching all this and disappears out back, coming back a few moments later with a set of bagpipes under his arm. He puts them on the bar and say's to the guy and his octopus, 'now if your octopus can play that I'll give you a hundred dollars'. The octopus takes a fond look at the bagpipes, lifts it up turns it over, has another look from another angle, and suddenly, with wild commotion, is all over it. But no sound. Puzzled, the octopus's owner comes up and says 'What are you pissing around for? Hurry up and play the damn thing!' The bar owner says, 'see he can't play it...where's my hundred bucks?'

'Let him be,' said the octopus' owner. Soon as he figures out he can't make love to it, he'll play it.

[Joseph E. Smith]

... an oldie, but a moldy.

[John Sweeney]

Music teacher to lazy pupil - "if you don't practice I'll tell your mother you have talent".

[Joseph E. Smith]

So... ummmm... Two guys walk into a bar, and you'd think that the second guy would've seen it.

[fel bautista]

I'm sorry , ahh, Mr. Smith , if that's your real name; we'll have to deny you boarding status based on your condition!

[gt350shelby]

On that note, how do you screw in a light bulb?

how many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

two, I don't know how they get inside but two mice can "screw" in a light bulb!

[ChristianRo]

Question to bass player: "What's the subdominant to F?"
Bass player answers: "Why do you ask? F IS the subdominant!"

[Joseph E. Smith]

I'm sorry , ahh, Mr. Smith , if that's your real name; we'll have to deny you boarding status based on your condition!

...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...dang it...
<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZCxdm231' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_11_7.gif' alt='Face Plant' border=0></a>

[tompipes]

How many sean-nos singers does it take to change a light bulb.
2
One to put in the new one and one to sing about how good the old one used to be.

Ba bum tish.

Tommy

[TheSilverSpear]

What do you yell when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?

B-flat minor.




A guy walks into a Belfast pub carrying a suspicious looking case and he orders a pint. The bartender says, "What's in the case." Your man says, "That's none of your fecking business." "Look, mate," explains the barman. "We can't serve you until you say what's in that case." The guy grumbles for a bit, but he really wants his pint, so he says, "Fine. It's several pounds of plastique." "Oh, that's okay," replies the bartender. "I was afraid it was a bodhran."




How do you get two uilleann pipers to play in tune with one another?

Shoot one.

[uilleannfinlander]

-where are you going?
-movies
-what movie is goin on now?
-Its Quo Vadis
-Ou, what does it mean?
-where are you going
-I'm going movies ,
-yep, what was the piece named?
-It's Quo Vadis
-Latin ,what does it mean?
-where are you going?
-movies....
..............


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