TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW.
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES
WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT.
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS.
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE
BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN.
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND
UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD.
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY
NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS.
Spotted in a safari park:(I sure hope so)
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR.
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A
DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR.
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT
THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET
LESSONS.
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR -
THE BELL DOESN'T WORK.)
