Really OT: Should Chiff & Fipple Do Random Urine Tests?

Post by **Dale** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 7:16 am

I've just started doing a research project (seriously) on products that are supposed to allow people to pass urine drug tests. Let me just say that the range of products sold is a tribute to those people so committed to marijuana that they will go to these lengths to try to pass the tests and keep their jobs or whatever.

And, if you want the very best, this probably is it:

http://www.urinetheclear.com/order/

Read it and prepare to be in awe.

Dale

JessieK · Post by **JessieK** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 7:36 am

I haven't had a real beer in eight and a half months, let alone any un-food substance other than Tylenol, vitamins and antacid. Give me a test!!! My colors will fly!

BrassBlower · Post by **BrassBlower** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 8:15 am

Where I work, they go straight for the blood, so they can keep their $99.95, as if I wanted it anyway.

Zubivka · Post by **Zubivka** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 9:12 am

What's horrifying to me, from what I get of the above, is that American workers may be submitted to pee or blood tests?
May someone please elaborate on the background, or we might take it here as just one piece (spelling?) of Americana.

Anyway, now I get better why your cyclists end up here in Europe

P.S. At $99.95 a shot, I should discount some on eBay: the Tour de France is near and it's our only season... Switching to a tea diet NOW.

Jeferson · Post by **Jeferson** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 10:55 am

Testing is picking up in other places too, Zub. Here, my life insurance company asked for a urine sample when I switched over to them. To get a job in law enforcement or security (eg. airport) you've got to submit a sample, too. I hear that Walmart asks for it as well, which I consider to be overkill.

I didn't mind submitting to the urine test. I told the nurse who visited me at home that I'd been studying for years.

Jef

The Weekenders · Post by **The Weekenders** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 11:01 am

Yeah, major retailers want it, like Target I think...

For CF, random door-bustin' searches for evidence of recorders seems more pertinent. Then, offenders will be on the LIST.

brewerpaul · Post by **brewerpaul** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 1:28 pm

JessieK wrote: Give me a test!!! My colors will fly!

Tell that to the poor guy, whose test comes back and tells him that he's pregnant!!

DCrom · Post by **DCrom** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 8:37 pm

This sounds like the setup for a long and involved joke I heard once.

Fellow taking the test was annoyed and brought in a bottle with a mixed sample from his family and pets.

The lab took longer than usual, but finally had a report:

The punch line was "You have diabetes, your wife has VD, and your daughter is pregnant . . . by your dog."

Post by **Dale** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 8:42 pm

DCrom wrote:
The punch line was "You have diabetes, your wife has VD, and your daughter is pregnant . . . by your dog."

Yessss. That joke will do nicely thank you.

Dale

ErikT · Post by **ErikT** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 8:48 pm

Dale, I think that a breathalyzer would be more appropriate here

Chuck_Clark · Post by **Chuck_Clark** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 9:07 pm

DCrom wrote: The punch line was "You have diabetes, your wife has VD, and your daughter is pregnant . . . by your dog."

That's the G-rated version of it, anyway.

DCrom · Post by **DCrom** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 11:14 pm

Chuck_Clark wrote:
DCrom wrote: The punch line was "You have diabetes, your wife has VD, and your daughter is pregnant . . . by your dog."
That's the G-rated version of it, anyway.

Yeah, but if I posted the full version I'd be banned for life.

Dis is a public message board, see? Do ya want kids to read this and get all mixed up? It's for the children . . .

McHaffie · Post by **McHaffie** » Tue Mar 30, 2004 11:45 pm

JessieK wrote:I haven't had a real beer in eight and a half months, let alone any un-food substance other than Tylenol, vitamins and antacid. Give me a test!!! My colors will fly!

If colors fly when you give a sample... you've got bigger problems than antacids... you need to see a doctor!!!

dtravers · Post by **dtravers** » Wed Mar 31, 2004 2:51 pm

You mean to tell me we weren't supposed to be submitting urine samples all along?

-Derek-
Dale, don't check your mailbox.

Wombat · Post by **Wombat** » Wed Mar 31, 2004 3:25 pm

I just did a very amateurish but effective urine test on myself. I tested positive for asparagus.

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Really OT: Should Chiff & Fipple Do Random Urine Tests?

Really OT: Should Chiff & Fipple Do Random Urine Tests?

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