The "Why Do I Call Bloomfield Bloomberg" Contest -

boomerang · Post by **boomerang** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 11:49 pm

oh Susnfx

thats just being naughty
clever... but naughty

Cynth · Post by **Cynth** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:22 am

Mother Bloo wrote:You are not to call my son "Bloomberg." His name is Bloomfield, and you know it. Back in my day I wouldn't have to say it, either.

Oh, I don't know why my son chooses to hang around here with you layabouts and reprobates. If he didn't, perhaps he would get out more and find a nice girl---wouldn't have to be a doctor, wouldn't have to be a lawyer, just someone with a little more sense than he has. Someone who could tell him that it's no way for an only child to care a fig about his mother and never visit, not even for the holidays. Or call! Like that's too much to ask for an aging, widowed mother, whose doctor has been very concerned.

You truly have my condolences.
How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!

Mother Bloo and Bloomfield in happier times.

PhilO · Post by **PhilO** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 11:14 am

Just a brief defensive word to our moderators regarding the placement of this thread here and not in the Pub. First of all, all of my prior malapropisms occurred here. Secondly, the prize is a whistle and that alone should qualify (barely) this thread as appropriate here (if anywhere, that is). Nananananah. Uh, where was I....

Oh yeah, the time draws nigh - just under 36 hours left; Bloomperson - I will forward via PM the list of my nominees; please discount in your considerations all of those who have expressed their love and admiration for you, as we should also discount any who are close personal friends of either or both of us (aka the short list).

Philo

PS This is not a trick of any kind; I will not award the world's first all cardboard whistle for example.

shadeclan · Post by **shadeclan** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 11:18 am

boomerang wrote: . . . Till at last the field of blooms ...or bloomfield.... is eternal, self sufficient, still exhibits the effects of bovine excrement, or as otherwise known as bloombergers or the singular bloomberg. . .

. . . So here is to bloomfield
Long may he ride. . .

I think you meant "slide"!

The Weekenders · Post by **The Weekenders** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 12:56 pm

FJohnSharp wrote:Bloomfield became Bloomfeld, when PhilO lost the 'i' in the seat cushions of his 1972 Camaro while putting the moves on a woman of questionable character.

It became Blomfeld when PhilO wanted to be PhilOO and stole an 'O'.

It became Blomseld when PhilOO replaced all the 'f's' with 's's' after getting pissed off about the founding fathers using 'f's' instead of 's's' in the Declaration of Independence, screaming, "If those guys were so smart, why didn't they know there was a @#$%& 's' in the alphabet?"

It became Blomserg when PhilOO discovered his Scrabble was incorrectly stocked with consonants, being short a 'D' and ahead one 'G'.

It became Blomberg when PhilOO remembered how he spent a summer rooting for Ron Blomberg, who almost won a batting championship while platooning at first base for the Yankees, but fell short in at-bats.

Then it became Bloomberg when PhilOO traded the 'O' for a Bloomfield tweaked Overton Low D tunable collapsible easy blower made by Barney Overton in Hackensack, New Jersey.

I called him Blofeld, but nobody picked up on the 007 reference.

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 12:59 pm

The Weekenders wrote:I called him Blofeld, but nobody picked up on the 007 reference.

I've been known to call him Renfield from time to time. And don't tell me I'm the only one who's noticed the lack of spiders and flies and such here on the chiffboard.

PhilO · Post by **PhilO** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:04 pm

The Weekenders wrote:
FJohnSharp wrote:Bloomfield became Bloomfeld, when PhilO lost the 'i' in the seat cushions of his 1972 Camaro while putting the moves on a woman of questionable character.

It became Blomfeld when PhilO wanted to be PhilOO and stole an 'O'.

It became Blomseld when PhilOO replaced all the 'f's' with 's's' after getting pissed off about the founding fathers using 'f's' instead of 's's' in the Declaration of Independence, screaming, "If those guys were so smart, why didn't they know there was a @#$%& 's' in the alphabet?"

It became Blomserg when PhilOO discovered his Scrabble was incorrectly stocked with consonants, being short a 'D' and ahead one 'G'.

It became Blomberg when PhilOO remembered how he spent a summer rooting for Ron Blomberg, who almost won a batting championship while platooning at first base for the Yankees, but fell short in at-bats.

Then it became Bloomberg when PhilOO traded the 'O' for a Bloomfield tweaked Overton Low D tunable collapsible easy blower made by Barney Overton in Hackensack, New Jersey.
I called him Blofeld, but nobody picked up on the 007 reference.

Yes, but you did so purposefully, with something aforethought, an obvious reference; I was apparently driven by subconscious primordial forces....thus the need to ferret out the underlying meanings therein...

Philo

Bloomfield · Post by **Bloomfield** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:22 pm

jsluder wrote:
The Weekenders wrote:I called him Blofeld, but nobody picked up on the 007 reference.
I've been known to call him Renfield from time to time. And don't tell me I'm the only one who's noticed the lack of spiders and flies and such here on the chiffboard.

No rats either, lovely juicy rats.

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:51 pm

Bloomfield wrote:
jsluder wrote:
The Weekenders wrote:I called him Blofeld, but nobody picked up on the 007 reference.
I've been known to call him Renfield from time to time. And don't tell me I'm the only one who's noticed the lack of spiders and flies and such here on the chiffboard.
No rats either, lovely juicy rats.

"Damn it! You know what? I'm sick of this crap. I'm sick of being the guy who eats insects and gets the funny syphilis. As of this moment, it's over. I'm finished being everybody's butt monkey!" -- Xander (after his brief stint as Renfield in Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Buffy vs Dracula)

Bloomfield · Post by **Bloomfield** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:43 pm

I think PhilO calls me Bloomberg rather than Bloomfield because he doesn't like me. And it hurts my feelings

Denny · Post by **Denny** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 5:11 pm

I think it's 'cause...

after they put in the condos and the shopping center...

jsluder · Post by **jsluder** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 5:16 pm

Bloomfield wrote:I think PhilO calls me Bloomberg rather than Bloomfield because he doesn't like me. And it hurts my feelings

PhilO doesn't like me,
PhilO really hates me,
He calls me Bloomberg.
Bloomberg's greasy,
Makes me queasy,
Everybody shuns Bloomberg.

PhilO · Post by **PhilO** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 9:15 pm

Bloomfield wrote:I think PhilO calls me Bloomberg rather than Bloomfield because he doesn't like me. And it hurts my feelings

Ok, nice try, but you are NOT eligible!

Philo

Bloomfield · Post by **Bloomfield** » Fri Dec 15, 2006 9:37 am

PhilO wrote:
Bloomfield wrote:I think PhilO calls me Bloomberg rather than Bloomfield because he doesn't like me. And it hurts my feelings
Ok, nice try, but you are NOT eligible!

Philo

This just not fair.

Bloomfield wrote:It's not funny.

BTW, I have received expressions of concern that this thread has crossed the line into the unfunny. Let me just say I meant to be funny when I said it wasn't funny. It's still funny, although if you knew my mother you wouldn't think it was funny to compare her to Mrs Bates, which makes it all the funnier.

Lorenzo · Post by **Lorenzo** » Fri Dec 15, 2006 10:59 am

With all due respect sir, this could be your finest hour.