You know you're a whistler when...

[wvwhistler]

... when you find that you've set the homepage on every computer you have access to at home and work to The Chiff and Fipple Whistle Forum or your favorite whistle maufacturers website.

[Walden]

• Your vacation to England is spent at the Clarke factory.
• You route your cross-country trip so you can spend the night with various C&F people, so you don't have to spend money on hotel rooms.
• You can't remember what you gave your wife for her birthday, but you remember what you gave Dale.
• You run for local school board, with the stated intent of getting the music program to teach whistle.
• You name your four children Howard, Meg, Clarke, and Goldie.
• You spend hundreds or thousands to fly halfway around the world for lessons to play an instrument that cost you a fiver.

[evenstr]

when you are drinking out of a straw and wonder if you can make a whistle out of it.

Not only do you wonder, you actually do it!

When you're bored at work or school and so doodle whistles, or better yet, the notes to your favorite tunes.

You judge how good your day was by how much you played your whistle.

You feel the need to make sure the local youth symphony has a whistle soloist when they do Lord of the Rings.

[wvwhistler]

...you keep eyeing the dog whistle wondering if you should attempt to convert it into the world's smallest funtional high D.
...you've been apprehended not once but twice, dumpster diving in the alley next to your favorite whistle maker's shop.
...you have converted your old musical car horn that plays "Dixie" to play an Irish tune instead.

[tegea]

While going to work each day with your car, you calculate your departure time depending on the train timetable to be sure to be stopped at the level crossing.

[straycat82]

-Your friend tattoos his knuckles: "L-O-V-E and H-A-T-E" and you tattoo your knuckles: "T1-T2-T3 and B1-B2-B3".

-When sitting in a meeting at work you find yourself holding your pen with the middle three fingers and thumbs of each hand.

-Your grandfather tells you that he wants to try out his new reel this weekend and your first thought has nothing to do with fishing.

-You try to find a way to make six carefully-sized and specifically-placed black circles a part of your written signature.

[riverman]

When you sit down to play for five minutes, and then play tune after tune after tune because you just can't put the whistle down.

[straycat82]

-You come home from vacation and find yourself checking the Chiff & Fipple board before you check your e-mail.

-You keep a framed picture of Dale Wisely in the hall with the family photos.

[tubafor]

You keep a framed picture of Dale Wisely in the hall with the family photos.

Are you saying there are people who don't have The Undisputed on their wall? Whoa... I thought it was a universal adornment...

You know you're a whistler when you're riding in the car (with your wife driving) with one hand on her lap, other hand on the doorframe, fingers twitching as you try to figure out the fingering for the song on the radio, and she asks "what tune are you playing now?"

[Mitch]

* You open a whistle shop

* You open a whistle shop and imediately test 100 Generation whistles.

* You open a whistle shop and argue with suppliers that "ocarinas are too far outside my core market"

* You adjust the sound on your ABC player to sound as much like a whistle as possible

* You flunked arithmetic at school but are willing to dive into woodwind mathematics

* You concoct the new 10 commandments:

1 Thou shalt play the whistle and the whistle alone - none of this clarinet stuff - dispensation might be made for bagpipes and string-ed instruments, but r*c*rd*rs are right out.

2. Thou shalt not sing the praises of the r*c*rd*r - he who utters the name of the beast or fails to aster-out the vowels therin will surely be visited by a pestilence of squeeky E's in the second octave.

3. 6 days will be the number of thy practicing, but on the seventh thou shalt rest lest RSI be visited upon your carpal tunnel. Eschew the death-grip lest thy circo go berserko.

4. Though shalt not do doodles of saxophones, nor yet will thee transcribe the dots of the cha-cha.

5. Thou shalt not take the name of your whistle in vain - if thou utterest "Wot the Clark are you lookin at?" you will get smitt for sure.

6. Honour Bernard Overton. He might be a bit grumpy, but he did get that great whistle to Finbar when his bamboo jobby went west.

7. Thou shalt not kill thy whistle, except by ernest tweaking.

8. Thy whistle is for playing music - it is not a crack pipe or a marrital aid.

9. Thou shalt not give false review - rememberest thou - not only is every whistle different, but every whistler is as well - Finbar's old bamboo banger worked pretty good till it carked.

10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's whistle, lathe or goat. Snide remarks about his technique will get a lightning bolt where you don't wanteth it when you least expecteth it.

[Tia]

[walrii]

You no longer try to explain to non-whistlers the funny comments on Chiff & Fipple.