amar wrote:What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
How many does it take jokes
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?izzarina wrote:amar wrote:What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
A: That depends on whether it has health insurance.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They just tell it to take two asprin and come round to the surgery later.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They only sign the death certificate and phone the mortuary.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They would diagnose depression and prescribe benzo diazapines.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Nurse!
Giles: "We few, we happy few."
Spike: "We band of buggered."
Spike: "We band of buggered."
- amar
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jsluder wrote:Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?izzarina wrote:amar wrote:What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
A: That depends on whether it has health insurance.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They just tell it to take two asprin and come round to the surgery later.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They only sign the death certificate and phone the mortuary.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They would diagnose depression and prescribe benzo diazapines.
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Nurse!
- perrins57
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How many Father-in-laws does it take to change a lighbulb?
You dont want to change that yourself, you want to get a professional in and I told you those lightbulbs were no good, you should have got the other ones, if you want my opinion, next time you should . . . .
You dont want to change that yourself, you want to get a professional in and I told you those lightbulbs were no good, you should have got the other ones, if you want my opinion, next time you should . . . .
"Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
(Name's Mark btw)
(Name's Mark btw)
- perrins57
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My attempt at a joke was based on Harry Enfield (British comedian) who had a Father-in-law character whose catchphrase was "You dont wanna do that!" Also on my own bitter experience. Soon after I was married my FIL came to help (ha ha ha ) me fit a Kitchen. "You dont want to fit that sink yourself, you want to get a plumber to do that". "You dont want a unit there you want it over here" "You shouldn't have bought one of those cookers!" "Here let me show you how I would do it" - My wife ended up down the doctors and I sat in the corner of the room rocking back and forth, muttering to myself, for three days. Aaaaaaarrrghhhhh.scarhand wrote:that sounds like a MOTHER-in-law response to me, especially getting the father-in-law to do the actual changing of the bulb . . .
"Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
(Name's Mark btw)
(Name's Mark btw)
- perrins57
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How many IKEA shop assistans does it take to change a light bulb?
"Sorry, we ran out of light bulb stock. We expect it to arrive early next month. We do have tea lights though!"
"Sorry, we ran out of light bulb stock. We expect it to arrive early next month. We do have tea lights though!"
"Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
(Name's Mark btw)
(Name's Mark btw)