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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:01 pm 
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benhall.1 wrote:
fatmac wrote:
Not heard of honeydos before, we'd just call it your chores.

I've never heard of "honeydos". But that's probably because no-one would ever call me "Honey". If they did, they wouldn't still be with me by bedtime.

Honeydos aren't chores, but upkeep projects: a fence needs repair, a lightbulb needs replacing, finishing the composting station, getting a new rug, fertilizing the lawn, the bust of Cthulhu needs a new plinth, what have you. Chores are commonplaces like doing the laundry, washing the dishes, walking the dog, or getting groceries. Cleaning the floor would be a chore; refinishing the floor would be a honeydo. The term "honeydo" might never have existed but for the commercial advent of the honeydew melon to inspire it. It presupposes a couple wherein there is a degree of division of labor, and "Honey" is the handyman/woman/unit who tackles those things that require either expertise, a willingness to get sweaty and dirty, perhaps fall from a height or mash a thumb, or at least deal with contractors. So "Honey, would you do this for me?" becomes "honeydo". It's familiar US jargon. It's not part of my usual vocabulary, but that's indicative of nothing.

As for being called "Honey", Ben: While in the States it's a common endearment between couples and in addressing one's children (it's practically a reflex), if ever you visit the Deep South be prepared to be called that by total strangers like your waitress. It's perfectly acceptable and normal, and not considered inappropriate at all. Your indignation will probably be met with hurt feelings, because it's intended to be friendly, intimate and familiar, and those qualities are considered good form in an informal social context. It's considered "down home", and that degree of familiarity is thought of as a good thing. Northerners are often taken aback by it, because normally we don't apply it to just anyone, but once you get used to it, it's just part of the landscape. If you don't get called "Honey", there could even be a problem, depending. Think of it as part of the charm that is Dixie.

There's a good amount of gender register to it. Seems to me that US males overwhelmingly reserve "Honey" for long-term life partners, whereas the womenfolk will be more free with it. A woman would readily call a child "Honey", but it's atypical for a man to do so.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:34 pm 
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It sounds as if as well as being transposed left to right on the roads another aspect of your culture is geographically inverted compared to us.

I don’t think we use “honey” but southerners are sometimes taken aback by being called “love” at the supermarket checkout. Up north we talk to one another on public transport as well.


Last edited by david_h on Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:37 pm 
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david_h wrote:
It sounds as if as well as being transposed left to right on the roads another aspect of your culture is geographically inverted compared to us.

For all we have in common, there is much that we also have in utter contrast.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:39 pm 
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(My second paragraph added whilst Nano was typing)


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 4:54 pm 
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I, on very rare occasions, have been called, "hon" a shortened version of "honey" in the workplace. It always seems very odd but of no consequence. I do however want to look at the speaker sternly and say, "I'm a Visigoth, not a Hun." I suspect this would be lost on most people.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 5:03 pm 
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david_h wrote:
... southerners are sometimes taken aback by being called “love” at the supermarket checkout. Up north we talk to one another on public transport as well.

I'm guessing that in the US, at least, we think that every Brit talks like Vera ("C'mon, luv - let's get this coat over you so you can hide the cuffs") - well, not necessarily everyone, but women not of the aristocracy, in any case. To us, calling someone "love" and "pet" is quintessentially British. But are you saying it's more a northern thing, then?

Because of her sartorial habit, I like to call Vera "Paddington Human".

Where I live, you only talk to strangers on the bus when there's a situational reason for it; otherwise, the first assumption is that you're probably crazy.

Michael w6 wrote:
I do however want to look at the speaker sternly and say, "I'm a Visigoth, not a Hun." I suspect this would be lost on most people.

Hell, it's worth a try, anyway.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 5:05 pm 
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Nanohedron wrote:
If you don't get called "Honey", there could even be a problem, depending. Think of it as part of the charm that is Dixie.

Yeah. It's ingrained. See, I actually did fancy the woman concerned. She obviously liked me, or she wouldn't have invited me out for dinner (it was clear she was going to pay). She was French. Maybe she'd picked up the term from watching American TV or films. But, as soon as she called me honey, the deal was off, as far as I was concerned. I didn't talk to her again after that. There are some things that are just beyond the pale.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 5:16 pm 
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I'd consider, "with the greatest respect." to be hyperbole and likely implicature. Its parallel, "with all due respect." seems to imply the speaker may feel little respect is due.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 5:23 pm 
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benhall.1 wrote:
But, as soon as she called me honey, the deal was off, as far as I was concerned. I didn't talk to her again after that. There are some things that are just beyond the pale.

I would agree (from a northern Yank's perspective, anyway, given our South's more relaxed attitude about the word) that it was far too early for that. "Honey" is a moniker that calls for a truckload of nuance, timing, and situational acumen. A friend with a maternal streak might call you "Honey" in an offhand way, and that's fine, but it's really shaky ground when a romantic interest calls you that right off the bat; it's a completely different situation with different rules. In my world, you have to have been cohabiting first, and probably for around a year, because it implies you both have comfortably settled in, share a life of some routine, and are committed to a long future together. At first glimpse, though? Please, let's gear it down, shall we?

Insult to injury was when she called you "cute". I try to make allowances in the case of foreigners, but "cute" does put me off. It comes off as shallow and even a bit predatory. But it's also a form of brushoff, depending - and I know this, because I've been there.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 5:34 pm 
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I recently had a similar confrontation when a coworker addressed me as, "young man." This is a vacuous way to address an adult. This coworker now addresses me as, "sir" I've told him my name. I'd prefer he just use that.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 6:11 pm 
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Thanks for the translations, Peter. Even so, some of them still took me a bit of work!

Peter Duggan wrote:
Tunborough wrote:
Is "loose" accurate, or is it a typo for "lose"? In my world, "lose" is a verb, "loose" is an adjective. The best I could make of, "to loose armband," would be, "moves to assistant captain." Fanciful at best.

I hadn't bothered with 'loose' because I thought obvious typo. So Terry to lose captaincy.

https://www.google.com/search?q=%22terry+to+lose+armband%22

Ah, but "loose" on its own can also be a somewhat dated verb meaning to let loose (one might loose an arrow, for example), and that was how I took it here, under the assumption that it was misused for "loosen". Man, this stuff can get complicated.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 7:11 pm 
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Michael w6 wrote:
implicature

A new addition to my word-hoard! I'll probably never use it, but that's okay; words and I are like Smaug and gold.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 20, 2020 9:38 am 
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Nanohedron wrote:
Honeydos aren't chores, but upkeep projects: a fence needs repair, a lightbulb needs replacing, finishing the composting station, getting a new rug, fertilizing the lawn, the bust of Cthulhu needs a new plinth, what have you. Chores are commonplaces like doing the laundry, washing the dishes, walking the dog, or getting groceries. Cleaning the floor would be a chore; refinishing the floor would be a honeydo.


Yes, your description is better than mine.

My daughter actually made me a (sort of) bust of Cthulhu. She got a stuffed Cthulhu, cut the head off, and mounted it on a plaque with hot glue. I thought it was genius.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 20, 2020 2:01 pm 
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chas wrote:
Nanohedron wrote:
the bust of Cthulhu needs a new plinth

My daughter actually made me a (sort of) bust of Cthulhu. She got a stuffed Cthulhu, cut the head off, and mounted it on a plaque with hot glue. I thought it was genius.

Your daughter's someone to be reckoned with, what with safari hunting in an alternate dimension and bagging the Mack Daddy of eldritch Great Old Ones and all.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:29 pm 
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We've gone OT in the Flute Forum and careened off into a discussion of "manky". That's another distinctly British word that you won't likely hear out of a Yank.

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