TO A NOOB POSTING IN THE WHISTLE FORUM
by W. B. Yeats

Post there upon the webpage;
What need have you to care
For slag or flamewar's rage?
And upload pics of your whistles, there,
That the condensation drops have wet;
Being a Noob you have not known
The Overton, nor yet
Tunes lost as soon as won,
Nor the "Best Whistle Ever?" thread
And all the sheet music to bind.
What need have you to dread
The Susato, the control of wind?

_________________
"Time is the wisest counselor of all." - Pericles

"I remain not entirely convinced of it." - Nano

NO SECOND DENTAL APPOINTMENT
by W. B. Yeats

Why should I not blame her that she filled my days
With misery, or that she would of late
Have taught to ignorant hygienists most violent ways,
Or hurled the little hurts upon the great,
Had I but anesthesia equal to desire?
What might have made her gracious with novocaine
That lack made painful as a fire,
But no needle poised above a throbbing tongue, with her brain
That is not natural in a profession like this,
Being high and solitary and most cruel?
Why, what else could I have done, she being what she is?
Was there another tooth for her to pull?

_________________
"Time is the wisest counselor of all." - Pericles

"I remain not entirely convinced of it." - Nano

Found scribbled in blue ink on a napkin in the inside pocket of the coat John Berryman left behind after his last dental appointment before he killed himself:

There were oddnesses, surely. Henry heard
clearly in the fluorescent hum
& the fluoride bottles a thing sò dolorous,
he must sigh, must pause: demur.
He has heard, before, Death glib
& more, & walking, yes, toward us,

but what of it? --Time is, Bones,
to open de mouf & pray.
--What God in white coat? I say
time is long, two long cats
& lazy (preening) on a long sill,
window wide, heavy open: that is that.

--Dis buzz like to shake Henry's soul, or
at least (supposing) his mind.
--Reach deep, then O pleasant doc,
and you will, in short time, find
surely plaque on my clacking clock,
the inevitable caries, wiggling molar.

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oh Lana Turner we love you get up

No wonder I didn't like poetry, in school we were taught
the American poems like William Carlos Williams' "XXI".

"XXI"

so much depends
upon

a white cleansing
tablet

fizzing in tap
water

beside the pink
dentures.

_________________
"Be not deceived by the sweet words of proverbial philosophy. Sugar of lead is a poison."

Good scholarship, people.

_________________
"Time is the wisest counselor of all." - Pericles

"I remain not entirely convinced of it." - Nano

UPDATE:

I brought my Berryman poem from farther up this thread to workshop a few weeks ago. It got very warm reviews.

I told them it was a joke. They think I'm silly, anyway, though.

_________________
oh Lana Turner we love you get up