WTB: Flute-playing pony

[s1m0n]

.. if I can't get a pony, a unicorn might do...

Might do what?

[Nanohedron]

.. if I can't get a pony, a unicorn might do...

Might do what?

Get caught on film. This shot is claimed to have been taken in the wild:



But it's a hoax. This unicorn is obviously domesticated: unicorns aren't exactly born with bridles on, you know. Plus it's too well-groomed to be wild, and that ain't no forest growth beneath its magical little hooves. I am personally disappointed, and offended on the unicorn's behalf, that the domesticated variety should be so duplicitously misrepresented. What, are they not "good enough"? Is that it?

[s1m0n]

Not only that, but that pony is clearly in need of medical attention - someone's shot an arrow into its forrid!

[Peter Duggan]

Might do what?

Do I have to explain everything twice for you, s1m0n?

Might be an acceptable substitute (i.e. make do) for a flute-playing pony if I can't get one... might even be more than acceptable with the unicorn being Scotland's national animal, except that I'd rather set my heart on a Shetland, don't know if you get Shetland unicorns, and still have concerns about the horn...

[Nanohedron]

Here's an idea, Peter: Get yourself a Shetland and tell everyone it's a proper Scottish unicorn, and that you removed its horn to save it from the poachers.

[Peter Duggan]

Still got to be able to play the flute, though! Source the Eric Dolphy of Shetland ponies for my mum's Jazz and I can consider the horn later...

[Nanohedron]

Still got to be able to play the flute, though!

First things first. You can teach it after the fact and save money that way.

I can consider the horn later...

You'd better think of it now, because they're gonna ask.

"Where's the horn, then?"

- "I sold it for a tidy sum on the black market." Imagine their horror! Or:

- "I made an elixir of it, and now have more powers than D&D ever dreamed of." Or:

- "It is in safe keeping, entrusted to a Tibetan hermit." Or you could pull out a repro narwhal tusk, and say:

- "Right here."

[Brus]

People say unicorns don't exist but ....

Have you ever seen a hippopotamus? It's a fat unicorn!

[paddler]

Anyone ever made a flute from unicorn horn? Are there CITES restrictions on that?

[AaronFW]

People say unicorns don't exist but ....

Have you ever seen a hippopotamus? It's a fat unicorn!

Um... Can you show me a hippopotamus with a horn?

[Peter Duggan]

You'd better think of it now, because they're gonna ask.

"Where's the horn, then?"

No, what I meant was as in whether to keep it. Not sure I could de-horn a unicorn, but could perhaps accept a horned pony if it does bass clarinet like Dolphy!

Anyone ever made a flute from unicorn horn? Are there CITES restrictions on that?

Not sure you'd get big enough pieces. Maybe for mounts/rings?

[Nanohedron]

You'd better think of it now, because they're gonna ask.

"Where's the horn, then?"

No, what I meant was as in whether to keep it. Not sure I could de-horn a unicorn, but could perhaps accept a horned pony if it does bass clarinet like Dolphy!

Oh, I see. I think. Still and all, if I had a Shetland pony I would totally tell people it was a unicorn.

Anyone ever made a flute from unicorn horn? Are there CITES restrictions on that?

This has GOT to be made of unicorn horn:

[s1m0n]

Any fule kno that unicorn horn don't crack. That flute is made of eggshell.

[Nanohedron]

Ah, so it's very tiny, then. That's why the weave looks so coarse.

Now THAT was a craftsman.

.

[jim stone]

I've read that in the zoo in Gaza, there are mules cleverly painted to look like zebras.
Reports that they play flute remain unconfirmed.