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 Post subject: Father's Day
PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2020 6:02 pm 
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I overlooked posting earlier. On Father's Day several people at my workplace wished me a happy father's Day. This seems very odd to me. "Happy Father's Day." is what one might say to one's own father, not some random male coworker. What do you think?

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 Post subject: Re: Father's Day
PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2020 6:52 pm 
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Michael w6 wrote:
On Father's Day several people at my workplace wished me a happy father's Day. This seems very odd to me.

I agree, but some people just have a strong sense of occasion, whatever the occasion may be. I don't recall if it was here, but a while back (it probably comes up every year) there was this to-do from people who get weirded out by total strangers wishing them a happy Valentine's Day. I suppose that's right up there, too.

What makes both instances strange for me is that while the greetings correspond with what are considered holidays, those holidays are at the same time intensely personal. For example, what if I was so greeted on Fathers' Day, but my own father is an utter monster, and I despise him? Or what if I have just lost him, and am grieving? What if I never even knew my father? What if I was the product of rape? All that aside, what if I want children but have none? Likewise with Valentine's Day: What if my SO and I just had an ugly breakup? What if, for whatever reason, my prospects for a loving relationship of my own are so unlikely that I've given up hope? Or are they maybe using the greeting obliquely in hopes of a date?

Most awkward, at best, because the greeting automatically assumes that life is a bowl of cherries for all.

The thing is, though, that it's just as fraught to beat them over the head with it. They mean well. Now, I was taught in no uncertain terms to try to put myself in other people's shoes, but this teaching isn't necessarily common practice, so it's unreasonable to expect someone to have what might never have been part of their formative upbringing. IOW, out of sight, out of mind. So sometimes it might take a thick skin to be on the receiving end. Me, I just absently nod and smile; I figure that should be good enough. If it isn't, then maybe that's a good opportunity to speak to the issue.

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 Post subject: Re: Father's Day
PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2020 9:05 pm 
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Nanohedron wrote:
Some people just have a strong sense of occasion, whatever the occasion may be.

That's the best explanation I've heard. Only over the past three years or so have random people wished me a happy Fathers' Day...which I find odd, as I neither have nor want children! And if I get thanked for my service on Memorial Day, I reply with, "You're welcome, but remember: Memorial Day is to honor the boys and girls who didn't make it home."

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 Post subject: Re: Father's Day
PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2020 9:32 pm 
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Dan A. wrote:
Nanohedron wrote:
Some people just have a strong sense of occasion, whatever the occasion may be"


Since my kids grew up I sort of forget when it is Christmas, have forgotten more birthday's than I can count, and couldn't tell you today when Father's or Mother's Day is.

I know when St. Patrick's Day is on the way by the increase in traffic in the sessions. And in the past 5 years or so I start staying home about a week into March.

Curmudgeon anyone?


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 Post subject: Re: Father's Day
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2020 5:24 pm 
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Dan A. wrote:
And if I get thanked for my service on Memorial Day, I reply with, "You're welcome, but remember: Memorial Day is to honor the boys and girls who didn't make it home."

As a veteran, it's good and appropriate for you to extend the reminder.

busterbill wrote:
Nanohedron wrote:
Some people just have a strong sense of occasion, whatever the occasion may be

Since my kids grew up I sort of forget when it is Christmas, have forgotten more birthday's than I can count, and couldn't tell you today when Father's or Mother's Day is.

I've said numerous times that I have zero sense of occasion. That's not entirely true, because if it were, I'd probably have a reputation for unbecoming behavior at funerals or children's parties and the like, and would be barred from every social event. So at least I have that much sense of occasion going for me. But holidays and birthdays (even my own) all catch me unawares. I may know it's Christmastime from the decor and music, but the day itself doesn't seem to exist for me until it's right in my face.

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